The Key to both Doors
by LoveIsAlways
Summary: Torn in two, Dani Winchester must make a decision between Heaven or Hell. With her decision, the fate of the world rests on her shoulders and she must decide quickly because her friends are being picked off...one by one. Slight Cas/OFC and OFC/OMC.
1. Prologue

Prologue

There comes a time where one must face a fork in the road, to go left or to go right is the question in mind. When you're unsure of which way to go, follow the path that calls to you, which way makes more sense. There's no point in being scared, it's just a path. Just a choice and if everything falls on you then you know it will get better, and if it's not, then it's not the end.

What do you do when your choice is between good and evil, when the whole of humanity rests on your shoulders?

In reality there's nothing you really can do because either way someone gets hurt. Either way the choice is made, and one side will win.

It doesn't really matter which side I choose though, both have a chance of winning. I just have to decide which side humanity has a better chance of surviving with. Whichever path I choose, good or evil, I will still have to fight and if fighting to the death is what it takes then that's what I'll do, but I doubt that I will make any difference. I'll just be another number in the body count at the end of the day.

_**Author's note**_**: Alright, so yet again I'm trying my hand at a new story…lets see how long I'll stick with this one. There's just a slight writers block with my other FF's so I will start this one to get my mind off of the others for a while. Please Please PLEASE review this one, I'm in LOVE with the show and with Sam and Dean Jensen/Jared, and I really want to write a story for them, so this is just the prologue, not **_**entirely**_** important but still, review and let me know if you're interested!**

**Thx, xoxo**

**LoveIsAlways**


	2. Tears for Dean

Chapter One: Tears for Dean

I sat about ten feet away from the whole Sam was digging, my knees drawn up to my chin, my arms forming a protective shield around myself. My eyes stared straight ahead, unblinking, and I didn't even flinch as he dropped the shovel beside me.

"Will you help me with his…" he trailed off, his voice hitching.

I stood up beside him, although we were twins you couldn't tell by the height difference as I only came up to his chest, and where he was a brunette I was blonde. I guess I had gotten those genes from my mother.

Nodding slightly I walked over to the sheet covered body that had once contained my brother's soul, but now it rested in hell, and only god knows what's happening to him down there.

I bent down and grabbed his legs while Sam took his arms and we lowered him down slowly into the hole where he could finally rest his weary head.

The two of us stood there at the edge of the grave and out of the corner of my eye I saw that Sam's knuckles had turned white from the harshness of the grip he had on the shovel and I reached my own over and placed it atop of his. Judging by his reaction the deed had been reassuring and he started to push the clumps of dirt back into the hole and over the body. I stepped backwards and started to turn around to head back to the car and as I studied it the events of tonight all came back in a rush causing me to stop dead in my tracks.

I was scared, to put it simply. Dad was dead, Dean was gone and now it was just Sammy and I, and what were we supposed to do now? Fight off everything demonic by ourselves, because I'm not sure if we can do this by ourselves, Dad or Dean were always there to help us, to guide us…_to protect us_, now it was just us two and we have to look out for each other. How can we do this by ourselves, we're the _freaks_, we're the reason our lives have been dedicated to destroying anything supernatural.

"Oh _god_," I muttered, my hands covering my face and from behind me I heard weeping. I turned my head to listen better and the sound of sobbing mixed with moans reached my ears and this time I turned around fully. Sam stood there hunched over the shovel and from where I stood I could see that his shoulders were shaking as he tried to keep his grief contained.

So that _I_ couldn't hear.

I walked back over, trying not to scare him and once in range of his body I placed a hand on his back and the shaking paused for a moment and then they wouldn't stop. His chest heaved up and down as he hyperventilated and I walked around to face him, pushing the shovel to the ground.

I had never seen something so painful than Sam's face at that second, he looked like something was tearing him from the inside, so confused and unsure that the tears broke the restraint I had on them and started to spill across my cheeks.

"Oh Sammy," I whispered as my hands held his face, my thumbs rubbing the streaks away. His hands gripped mine and then they fell to my shoulders before he crushed my body to his and at that moment I could feel every emotion that he was feeling. The bond that we had allowed this to happen for the both of us at physical contact, and only if the emotions were powerful, and the ones we were both feeling were. The pain, the anger and the confusion were compressed into this hard ball that we shared between us, and the vulnerability only broke us down even more.

Together we cried, and we held each other. We mourned as one over the loss we both have just suffered, we wept for our lives, our family but most of all…

We cried for Dean.

* * *

Two months later we sat at Bobby's going over some lore on some kind of creature that he had gotten a lead on. I leaned over Bobby's shoulder as we muttered about the spirit, on ways to kill it and what was its business in the small town. I looked up and Sam was sitting on the couch, looking out a window as the sun slowly dipped behind the horizon.

I glanced to my side and Bobby and I shared a look as I called out to my brother, "Sam, what do you think?"

His head turned to face the two of us and he appeared as though his mind had been on a completely different subject, but nowadays his mind was permanently on another subject and I was starting to loose patients with him.

"Think about what?"

I sighed heavily and rolled my eyes, "The Banshee Bobby and I have been talking about for the past hour and a half. _Hello_? Earth to Sam, wake up!"

"Oh, right right…The Banshee sounds…"

"Sounds what, Sam?" I interrupted him, "you weren't even listening were you?"

He gave me a sheepish look, "Uh…no, not really."

I growled and threw my hands up to the ceiling, "Of course not, you never listen to anything anymore. You've got too much going on up there," I snapped, tapping my own head hard, "that you never pay attention to anything outside of the walls of your head."

He glared at me and opened his mouth to speak but I beat him to the chase, "Now if you had of been listening, you would have heard my opinion on this matter."

"Oh yeah? And what would that be?" He spoke through gritted teeth.

"I think that it might be good for us if we go hunt this thing down…"

"Well we can't," Sam snapped, "in case you've forgotten we have something else on the go."

I sighed and walked around Bobby's desk, "All I'm saying is that if we take this job, maybe it will help get this…one off of our minds and then maybe we might run into something that could help us, or find another means of help that we could try."

Sam was silent for a while, and the length of the pause was giving me hope that maybe he was contemplating the job, and then my hopes were shot down like a bird from the sky, "No."

I faltered, "What do you mean "no"?"

"I don't want to do this job," he said, standing up, "I don't want to get sidetracked, I'm going to find a way to bring him back Dani, and I'm not giving up until I do."

"Come on Sammy; just think about this for a moment. What if when we're hunting we come across someone who can help us, or a new séance, or what if we find another summoning spell, huh?"

"What ifs. They're all what ifs, Dani," he said tiredly, standing and hoisting his bag onto this shoulder.

I growled and took a few threatening steps forward, I could feel another one of our fights coming, "Sam. It's been two months, two months of _nothing_. We've had no leads, no clues, and no _help_. Nothing has worked, so why are you still so _determined_?"

"There has to be something out there."

"There's _nothing_ out there, we've searched through everything, we've tried all we know that summons or brings back spirits, Sam. It's time to give up and move on."

He gave me a look and shrugged a shoulder, "you can give up if you want, because that's just typical Danielle, always the one to give up first, weren't you? Do whatever you want, I'm going to continue looking, and I'll just know that you never cared."

I stared at his back and then quickly dismissing his insults as hidden anger I tried to convince him to give up one last time, "Dean's gone Sam, he's dead and he's not coming back."

Sam stopped dead in his tracks and then wheeled around to stomp forwards in my direction, he then stood inches from me, "he may be dead but he won't be for long because I'm going to bring him back…if it's the last thing I do."

Becoming angry, I glared at him and as I spoke my voice rose bit by bit, "We've tried _everything_ Sam. We've tried making deals, finding holes in his contract, hunting down Lilith. NOTHING HAS WORKED SAM, _nothing_. He's dead, Sam. DEAN'S DEAD, he's GONE and he's NEVER COMING BACK. So just give up on your determination to bring him back, give up and get over-."

I never got a chance to finish because my head snapped to the side and I stumbled a little, I didn't even notice the tears through the stinging pain in my cheek. All was silent as I turned my head slowly to look back at Sam, my hand rubbing my cheek.

I sniffed before I spoke and a tear fell down my cheek and across my fingers, "Okay, you can continue searching or doing what ever it is that you are planning to do, but from now on you're doing it on your own," I spoke as I looked into Sam's all to familiar wounded puppy look and as I brushed his arm while passing him I heard his voice whisper my name but I was already at the door.

"I can't do this anymore."

And I was gone.

**_Author's Note_: Alright, so I was pretty sure that I wasn't going to get any reviews on the Prologue...I mean it is the Prologue right, not the _actual_ story. So now that the real plot has been set into motion, I`m REALLY hoping I get a few reviews, it helps me alot in writing and it gives me motivation to continue. **

**Thanks, xoxo**

**LoveIsAlways **


	3. The Value of a Presence

_**Author's Note**_**: So, this is the third time I've updated on this story and so far I've got 0 reviews, 0 favourites and 0 alerts on this story, 19 people of read it but they haven't left their mark in a review nor with the other two possibilities. I'm getting a little upset now because I'm starting to think that this story isn't **_**any**_** good. My friends read it at school, they say it's good but they have to, and they aren't Supernatural fans like I am. I **_**really**_** need you to let me know if it's any good. Even the story alerts and favourites let me know.**

**Thank you for listening to my blabber now on with the next chapter,**

**Xoxo, LoveIsAlways.**

Chapter two: The Value of a Presence

I had been residing in Jackson, Tennessee for the past month since I left Sam's side, and in one month I landed myself a decent job and a fairly liveable apartment. It wasn't a gorgeous penthouse or anything but it was somewhere to sleep and eat at and it was the safest thing from anything demonic for the next couple of miles. It doesn't matter where I am, I'm always prepared, because it's when I'm unaware, that the past comes back to bite me.

* * *

Enjoying the last few minutes of my break, I sat at one of the booths flicking through text messages and missed calls from my cell. There were a few from a couple of girl friends, one or two from Ryder; the closest thing I could call to a best friend, and the few missed calls I get from Bobby every few days.

There was nothing out of the ordinary which was my cue to get back to work and as I stood up to tie the apron around my waist the door bell rang as someone entered and I could feel the cool air conditioning escape through the open door. I looked up and couldn't really help but stare at the man who came in because the first thing I saw was his trench coat. I watched as his head turned to look around the diner, it was almost as if he was curious about the scene he was in and because it seemed that he was new to it, he had a slightly awkward shuffle as he walked towards a secluded booth that was further away from the rest of the customers.

I moved quickly to the counter to retrieve my note pad and from the side Penny muttered that he was sitting at one of my scheduled tables. I shot her a look and swiftly made my way over to the man sitting, and as I stopped beside the table I caught a glimpse of brooding eyes, their intensity stopped me in my tracks and I faltered, my voice catching in my throat before I choked out my rhythmic greeting,

"Good afternoon Sir, may I take your order?"

His head slowly turned to face me as he had been sitting there staring straight ahead, his face was emotionless but it felt like he was studying me.

"Are you Danielle Winchester?"

My mouth dropped open, "I…" _how does he know my name? _"I am."

"I must speak with you, it is urgent."

Giving him an odd look I spoke slowly as if I wasn't sure on what he had said, "I…can't right now. I just started…my second half."

"It can wait, what I have to say, cannot."

Taking a firmer tone this time, I spoke, "Look Mister, I can't just get up and leave with you in the middle of my shift, I have other customers and besides…this isn't a Bar where you just waltz in here to pick up the waitresses."

I started to turn away when he grabbed my wrist and suddenly I wasn't at the diner anymore, instead once I opened my eyes I found that I was outside in some random old abandoned junk yard. The man let my wrist go and I stumbled forwards a little, I frantically looked around and when I found that I wasn't in a familiar area I wheeled around and began to give him a piece of my mind.

"What the _fuck_ just happened?"

"I brought you to a place where we can talk more privately."

"In an abandoned _junk yard_?"

He looked around and merely stated that it wasn't planned.

"Alright, you know what? This whole thing is completely messed up. So you come in, knowing my name and demanding that you speak with me, when I tell you 'no' you go ahead and _transfer_ me to the middle of nowhere. All of this has happened and I don't even know _your name_."

"Castiel."

I shook my head, "what?"

"My name is Castiel, and I did not 'demand' to speak with you I simply stated the urgency in speaking with you."

I gave him an incredulous look, "you have got to be kidding me, why the _hell_ should I talk to you, I don't know who you are or _what_ you are because no human that I have ever met can just 'poof' people from here to there, now just abracadabra me back to my job so I can get back to work."

"I can't do that."

"And why not?"

The man named Castiel took a few steps towards me, "not until you understand the value your presence possesses."

"Will you quit speaking in poetic ways; you're acting like you're all high and mighty when you and I both know that you are no different than any other person who walks on this planet."

"That is where you are wrong, I am much more different than the average human but you would know where I'm coming from, wouldn't you?"

"Are you calling me a freak, because that's rich, the pot calling the kettle black." I snarled, my body taking a defensive pose.

"Danielle, you do not understand the true importance of this conversation, but if you allow me to explain maybe I will be able to supply answers to questions you have been asking your whole life."

I rose an eyebrow, "the only question I've ever had is why the hell couldn't myths just stay myths because it'd be awesome to just be afraid of what's lurking in my closet without holding a .45 for protection."

Castiel sighed, "For all of your life you've known about demons and everything supernatural, but what you haven't known is that Angels do exist among humans."

I snorted, "You're crazy."

"No," he stated bluntly, "I'm an Angel of the Lord."

Staring at his face, I tried to detect some sort of clue to prove that he was pulling my leg but when none came I decided to brush it off and laugh. When my howling ended I looked back at him and his face remained as expressionless as ever, "I understand that you do not believe me, most do not, but is this proof enough for you."

Then out of his back like a huge shadow came a pair of black wings that casted them selves across the piles of scrapped cars. My mouth dropped open for a split second but I regained myself quickly, "I thought your wings were supposed to be white?"

"Stereotype," Castiel said, brushing my comment off.

"But then if you're an Angel, a real Angel. How come no one has noticed you before?"

Castiel was not surprised that I had accepted the truth so quickly, as he spoke calmly, "My brothers and I have not walked the Earth in thousands of years, but now we are among you because tribulation is fast approaching and we are here to stop it."

"Stop what from happening?"

"The Apocalypse."


	4. Heaven or Hell

Chapter Three: Heaven or Hell

Three days after I had learned everything from Castiel, I was still in shock of it all. After getting off of the phone with Ryder, the only energy I felt like sacrificing, that is, until he got here, I continued to sit on the floor with my back up against the wall.

Time passed quickly between my wait and his arrival and when he did he plopped the pack of twenty four I had told him to bring down beside me and followed suit.

"What's up?"

I was silent for a few minutes and I could feel his gaze burn the side of my face, so I turned slowly to look at him.

"I need to tell you some things about myself; I'm going to go crazy if I keep it to myself."

"O…kay?"

"I suggest that you grab a beer…or two, this is going to take a while."

So I told him, told him everything. From what happened when I was a baby, to the life I lived with my Father and brothers as a hunter. I told him what we hunted, and how we hunted it. I explained the motels I lived in and the nights us three kids would spend sleeping in the back seat of the Impala.

Then I went on to describe my brothers and how Sam left for college at eighteen, the fight him and my Dad got into and how all of that led up to the journey we shared after Dad disappeared. I told him that the same Demon that had taken my Mom from us came back and took Jess from Sam and then this triggered a year of searching for Dad to find answers on this thing, and from there I got into Dad's death. How he made a deal with the son of a bitch in order to save Dean.

"So in case you're wondering what happened, a Demon possessed a truck driver and drove into the side of the Impala, Dean was the only one seriously hurt and he was in a coma for a while, the Doctors said there wasn't much of a chance of him coming to again." I stated, taking a swig from my fourth bottle.

"So…why are you here then, shouldn't you be with your brothers now?"

I sighed and flicked the bottle cap across the room, "Last year Old yellow eyes kidnapped Sam and I, he said that it was time for us to start an army, and we would be the leaders. Well…when Dean and Bobby finally found us, another man…I think his name was Jake, was told to kill Sam, so he came up behind my twin and stabbed him in the back."

"Ho…ly shit…" Ryder said, popping open his third beer.

I nodded, my eyes shut tight, "Dean and I were both torn to shreds because of it, I thought I was worse off because I'm his twin, sometimes we feel each other's pain and emotions, but Dean proved me wrong by making a deal to bring Sammy back to life."

"WHY? After what happened with your Dad…"

I blew a short puff of air out my nose, "I know…and I nearly killed him for it, but he saved Sam…he had the balls to do what I wanted to do, but I just couldn't. So for the next year, we spent an endless amount of time trying to find a way out of the contract, but in the end Lilith held it and she's a bitch to track down, much less kill. In the end, Dean's time was up and he was taken by the Hell hounds, and now his soul lays restless in hell, and I couldn't do anything to save him. Believe me I tried, both Sam and I spent two months trying to find help and I gave up, it was useless, we hadn't gotten any where and I told him to give up as well. We got into a fight, and it ended with me leaving…now I'm here thinking it was all over and then this person named Castiel shows up and spits out the truth of him being an Angel."

Ryder gave me a strange look, "Okay, Demons I can sort of believe but _Angels_, come on Dani, I'm not that stupid."

I snorted before downing the rest of my beer, "believe me, I had the same reaction. But…he is the real deal and on top of everything I've gone through, all the deaths and bull shit my life has over come, this…_Angel_ throws another curve ball at me."

"What could possibly happen next?"

"I know right!? Supposedly a "Prophet of the Lord" made a prophecy years ago," I stated before seeing the "Oh come on" look on Ryder's face, I held up a hand telling him to let me continue, "_When a girl is born on the second day of the fifth month in the year that ends in eighty three to a family who's life is dedicated to taking evil out of Our Father's land, an Angel is reborn. At the age she becomes a woman, she will be given a choice, and with that choice the world will rise or fall and good will triumph or succumb to evil._"

Ryder was silent as he analysed the "prophecy" and then I spoke again,

"So, not only am I part Demon… I have a reborn Angel in me too and _that_ is the most fucked up part."

Ryder remained silent and I poked him, "well…what's your final reaction?"

He turned his head to me and stared, finally he looked down, "the beers gone…"

I scrunched my eyebrows, "what?" and then looked down, "hey, you're right."

In was true, the once twenty four full bottles of beer were now empty and all around us, "Wow, and I'm not even buzzed."

Ryder snickered, "that's because our beer sucks."

After a short pause between his beer comment and now, he spoke, "I'm not sure if I believe you or not…you know? All my life I believed that this shit was fake, all myths and scary stories, but all your life…you've been fighting them. Now…you're like this…epically awesome mutant that's part human…part good and part evil."

"Wow…thanks Ryder," I was unsure if that was a compliment, "and I don't expect you to believe me or not…I just needed to tell someone, and I trust you the most. I don't mind if you think I'm crazy."

He smiled and then patted my head, "Of course I think you're crazy, but we all have a fucked up part of ourselves hidden away somewhere."

I laughed and swatted at his hand, "yeah, yeah. Help me clean this shit up."

* * *

I hadn't heard from Castiel in a couple of weeks and frankly I was just not in the mood to either. I spent all night helping Penny comfort Matt after the funeral today. The police department have been suspecting a Serial Killer for a while now, but now who ever it is, he's hitting too close to home for me because friends of mine are dying suddenly, and I was becoming suspicious. A week ago, Matt's younger brother, Miles was murdered in an extremely gory accident; I was upset that I didn't get there in time to help him because if I had of, he would be alive today. No, it doesn't happen that way though, so instead I spent all night crying with Penny and Matt, trying to comfort them both.

In fact, as soon as I walked into my bedroom after getting home at six in the morning I crashed on my bed, and I didn't wake up until I felt a presence in my room at eight at night the same day. I slid my arm under the pillow and clenched the silver knife I always kept there and shot up out of bed, I stood there in a defensive stance with the knife held out away from me as the bedroom lights clicked on by themselves and I saw that the figure sitting at the bottom of my bed was only Castiel.

"CAS? What the hell, don't you _knock_?"

"You were dreaming."

I raised an eyebrow at him, pulling on a pair of sweats, "Yeah? That's what most people do when they sleep."

He stood up and turned to face me, and under his gaze I felt extremely self conscious in a pair of sweats and my bra…and I never care how underdressed I am around the male species…then again…he was more than just a male.

"You seem upset."

"Do I?" I scoffed, "what gave you that impression?"

Slowly he walked around the bed towards me and I grabbed the sheet to cover myself with, when he was standing inches away from me his eyes looked into mine as if they were searching my soul and what came out of his mouth surprised me, "it isn't your fault."

I stumbled with my words as I tried to speak and the only thing I could manage was a mangled "What?"

"Your friend's tragic bereavement, it was not your fault."

I stared at him and gave a half smile, "I appreciate that, but you really don't understand how much at fault I really am," and I walked past him and into the living room.

Listening to his almost silent footsteps as he followed me I decided to change course and go into the kitchen to grab some food but before I could make it to the counter with the milk and cereal, he surprised me for the second time that night, "May I propose something?"

Turning slightly but still managing to pour the milk in my cereal, I answered, "you don't usually "propose" anything you just tell me straight out, but because you asked nicely, I suppose _I _can allow it."

Castiel completely ignored my sarcasm and jumped into his, what I now realize, speech, "First I should explain the… struggle that will take place over you, as you already know, you are valuable to both the Angels and the Demons for when the time of the Apocalypse falls upon us. Knowing this, you may…encounter some rough patches with either side where they will try to _persuade_ you into joining their side, and I will say that their ways of persuasion are not always _pleasant_."

"Should I be…worried?"

He sighed in a way that said he didn't want to admit this but would anyway, "Yes, you should be worried…but that's where I come in."

I gave him a look of confusion while taking a bite of the sweetness, urging him to elaborate.

"I'm giving you the choice, and I want to make it clear that you do not have to do this if you absolutely do not want to, but I am supplying myself to teach you ways on controlling your Abilities."

"Controlling my Abilities? What's that supposed to mean."

Castiel came over to sit at the table, and he continued, "Because you were born with a new Angel inside of you, some of its Abilities will filter through you, meaning you will be able to do other things that you normally wouldn't be able to do. I am offering myself to train you on how to control this, but it still is your choice if you want to."

"What kinds of things would I be able to do?"

"I don't know, if you were to agree to my proposition you would go through a series of tests in order to determine it or them, depending on how many you have."

"Now…is this advised by you?"

"It might help you in the future when you need protection against more than just Demons."

I looked up at him with a serious expression and nodded,

"I'm in."

_**Authors note**_**: Hey Everyone!**

**You have no idea how insanely happy I am that two people have alerted AND put this story as their favourites. I would like to thank Racheljanelle and Nwinchester so much.**

**There is one more thing; I'm still looking for reviews because I don't have any of those yet. PLEASE review, I love your feedback, it really does help.**


	5. That wasn't meant to be heard

Chapter Four: That wasn't meant to be heard.

Penny sat with me on her break as I cleaned glasses. Business was slow today and so was our conversation, even though any other day we could talk for hours on end without any hint of stopping. As the silence between us grew I decided to end it because one, I wasn't one for silence and two, I needed to ask her this, I just needed to know how she was holding up with everything.

"Hey…um…how's Matt doing? I mean, is he any better?"

She looked up at me and shrugged, a sigh escaped her lips, "He's…okay I guess. I mean he's _better_ than before but he's still torn and everything, I don't think he realizes the finality and all. The other day he told me he was waiting for a call from him, they were going to get together for beers the next night. I was so heartbroken _for_ him that I didn't have the heart to tell him that he was gone."

I nodded, placing another glass on the counter, "That's understandable, the pain is still there and it's setting into denial now. It will get worse, and then he'll get better, it's going to take a while, but he'll get there. Eventually, time will heal his pain."

She gave me a funny look, _how would you know?_

"I know, I know. 'How would I know?' A few months before I came here, I lost my oldest brother; I guess I'm still hurting deep down about it. So I can relate to Matt's loss, and yours."

"I'm sorry, I didn't know."

I gave her a soft smile, "It's okay, I never told you. The only one who knows is Ryder, and he hasn't even known for long."

_Oldest brother? How many does she have?_

"I have two," I said out of the blue, "Dean…he's the one who died, and Sam is my twin."

She gave me an awkward look, "Uh…"

"That's what you asked me right? How many brothers I have?"

"No…I didn't say _anything_."

This time I gave her a strange look, setting the cloth down, "I could have sworn you said it."

_No, but I thought it_.

I snorted, shaking my head in disbelief, "That's impossible, no one can read minds."

This time the look she gave me was of pure fright and I swallowed hard, denial setting in, "Uh…I'm going to take the rest of the day off…I have some…uh, errands to run."

With that I took my apron off and placed it on the counter before walking quickly to the back door and out into the sunlight. I stood there for a few minutes; just staring across the street before walking to my motorcycle that stood in the spot I had parked it earlier this morning. I stood beside it and pulled out my cell before sending a quick text to Ryder,

"Are you busy?"

A second later my phone beeped and "No" flashed across the screen, I typed a reply, "Meet me at my apartment in twenty minutes, I need to go to the store for some food and I'll bring back some Pizza and beer."

I turned the ignition on and my baby roared to life, humming between my legs. I smiled as the feeling of recklessness passed through my body as it always did when I turned her on and I tore out of the employee parking area and onto the street.

The two of us sat in my apartment much like we had the other day when I confessed everything to him. Considering that I had no typical means of entertainment such as cable or a computer, instead I had one huge sound system and hundreds of CD's, we would usually spend our time together eating and drinking the night away with music blasting in the background. When the time came and the beer was gone and we were drunk off of our asses, we would dance. We danced, and we danced, and we danced until we would just pass out on whatever surface available, wake up the next morning and we would share the misery of one killer hangover.

This never bothered me before, partially because when I did this with Ryder it was because I was trying to forget what had happened to me just months before, I tried to forget everything that took place in my life, and the alcohol and Ryder helped me take it all away. Now, as I think about what we would _probably _end up doing, I didn't really want to, it wasn't right to flit around like a pair of fairies in the happiest of times, a friend of ours just died and in the typical tradition I follow, I should be nosing around for details about it, not drinking the nights away and sleeping the days away, pretending as if nothing had ever happened.

When I got through the front door, Ryder was sitting on my couch, the music already blasting. I didn't really look at him before I starting putting the bottles away and placing the pizza on the table, I didn't _really_ notice him until he was standing right beside me and his hand touched my shoulder, making me jump four feet off of the ground.

"A little jumpy?"

"Shut up and eat your pizza," I smirked before falling into the seat beside the deliciously smelling food.

Picking up a slice and not even bothering to grab a plate, Ryder fell into the seat beside me and ate his food obnoxiously. I watched him in slight disgust mixed with amazement on how much he reminded me of a certain someone.

"Men and their eating habits," I mocked to myself, "you all act as if you've never seen food before."

Ryder smirked at me with a full mouth and before speaking he swallowed what he was chewing hard, "Ugh…that hurt. And yes, I have seen food before. Your reaction just amuses me is all."

I smiled at him thoughtfully, "that's what Dean used to say…but in blunter terms."

Nearly choking on the piece of crust he had been eating, he managed to speak in a raspy tone, "Shit, sorry. I should have known it reminded you of someone, I'm sorry, I didn't mean-."

"It's fine," I laughed, "no worries."

I saw him nod and then turn to focus more intently on his food, but I heard his voice speak, _damn it, I'm such an idiot. Why do I always blow things with her?_

I looked at him confused, "you're not an idiot."

His head shot up and he gave me a funny look, very much like the ones Penny had given me, "Really? Cause I've only been telling you that for weeks now."

I ignored his comment and took a bite out of my own slice of pizza and then washed the saltiness of it down with a swig of beer before he spoke again, "Remember when you first came to town?"

I snorted, "Yeah. Shit-ass town that looked like it hadn't seen civilization in years, the first thought that popped into my mind was 'where's the Checker's tournament?'."

"Shut up," he laughed, shoving my shoulder.

"Well it's true," I chuckled.

"Well while you were thinking about Checkers, the whole town was afraid of the corruption you'd bring."

I choked on my mouthful of beer, "W-what? Corruption? What the fuck?"

"The town was terrified of you."

My mouth dropped open in shock, "you're shitting me? The town was afraid of me? C'mon I'm a single chick that's barely a hundred and forty pounds. Who's afraid of me?"

"When a girl with ink rolls up on a motorcycle with absolutely nothing known about her, she dresses more male like than any other girl in town, and on her first night here she kicks the shit out of the town bully…what isn't scary about that?"

"…well, when you put it that way…I guess that is a little unfamiliar but still! I'm not scary when you get to know me."

"I know that," Ryder reassured me, "and so does everyone else, it's the whole "Fear of the Unknown" thing, besides I wasn't afraid of you."

I raised an eyebrow at him, "oh yeah?"

"Yeah! I thought you were one of those cool girls, the ones who just don't give a shit what they do and when they do it."

_I thought you were the most gorgeous girl I had ever seen._

"Excuse me?"

"I said that you were one of those-."

"I heard that, but you thought I was gorgeous?"

His eyes shifted and he gave an awkward laugh, "uh…way to hide the Ego, Dani. I never said anything like that."

"No, I _heard_ you," I spoke determinedly, standing up, "you said "_I thought you were one of the most gorgeous girls I had ever seen_" I heard you, Ryder."

I watched as he paled a few shades and then as he tried to save himself, "I think you're just flattering yourself…I don't think of you like that."

I opened my mouth to speak again but decided against it, not wishing to push it further, "okay, maybe it is the Curse of the Winchester Ego coming back to haunt me."

"Yeah…um I should probably go, I promised Penny that I would give her and Des a ride to the movies after their shift…um I'll call you later, I guess."

I watched him get up from the chair and rinse out his beer before placing it on the counter, "yeah…okay. Call me whenever."

For some reason the awkwardness felt as if we had just had a one night stand and had run into each other at the Pharmacy, that was about as close as I could get to describing the atmosphere. As the door shut behind him I leaned my head back and it hit the wall with a hard thud and I groaned, "Shit…why the hell did I say anything…where the hell is Cas?"

"CAS?!" I called out as I stood, rinsing my own bottle out and then turned around again, "CASTIEL, WHERE ARE YOU? I NEED TO TALK TO YOU!"

When no sign of him came I growled and stormed off into the bathroom muttering something about Angels never coming when they're needed the most. When I finished drying my hands I opened the door, Cas stood there in his familiar brown trench coat,

"You called?"

_**Author's Note**_**: Hey everyone, you have no idea how happy I am that I finally have a few reviews, sure it's only three but I'm still INSANELY happy with that. That doesn't mean that a few more couldn't hurt ^_^ . I would like to give a special shout out to nwinchester, Supersam1906, and Alexitonic for your reviews.**

**Hope you enjoyed the chapter, the next will be up soon **

**Xoxo, LoveIsAlways**


	6. Warning

Chapter Five: Warning

I jumped out of my skin for the second time that night when I saw Cas standing there like it was the most normal thing in the world. After catching my breath I growled and pushed past him and into my bedroom where I quickly pulled off my shirt and changed into my pyjama one before he could come in,

"I wasn't clued in on the knowledge that the outside of my bathroom door was the new hang out for Angels now."

"My apologies for scaring you yet again, I had other matters I was attending to."

I rolled my eyes and scoffed as I pulled on the pair of shorts I wear to bed, "Whatever. We need to talk."

Again I pushed past him and into the kitchen to boil some water for tea and I felt him follow me, his silence was nerve wracking and it was slowly going to drive me insane, "Alright, what did you need to talk to me about?" He asked, taking a seat in the chair Ryder had vacated.

I sucked in a breath and let it out, "I think I found one of my abilities you were talking about."

His expression that hadn't been of complete attention before was now on full alert and he watched me intently, "How did this happen?"

So I explained to him about this afternoon with Penny and then with Ryder, and the strangeness of it all. It was absolutely insane to think that anyone, let alone myself could 'read' minds like an open book. Castiel listened intently to my story and the way he looked at me was beginning to creep me out because he would barely blink…and it was weird.

"So you're saying that you 'heard' their thoughts, like they had spoken out loud." He asked me, setting the facts straight.

I nodded violently, "yeah, it sounded _exactly_ like them. I heard them but I didn't see their lips move."

He nodded slowly and I could see the gears turning inside of his head, "I'll look into this and we will test it out tomorrow, dark has fallen on us and it would be best if you rested yourself before tomorrow. I will be here to get you up at dawn."

I growled out profanities as he disappeared into thin air, the thought of getting up _that_ early was terrifying. Walking into my room and crawling under the sheets, I lay there staring up at the ceiling thinking to myself and somehow I got onto the topic of Castiel. I couldn't help but feel that he was up to something somewhere else because the long time periods that he would disappear for were strange and irritating, what were his 'matters" that needed his attendance?

* * *

I sat half awake at another diner in the neighbouring town with a cup of coffee between my palms. No, saying that I was only half awake was an understatement; I was _barely_ awake and kept nodding off, nearly falling into the mug of coffee multiple times before Castiel would wake me up. Technically I was supposed to be reading peoples minds, _supposed to be_ being the key words because I was pretty sure that the two encounters yesterday were just flukes. Castiel was insistent on doing this so I just followed, because if you didn't know, arguing with him was like talking to a wall…he was very much like Dean had been.

Taking the rest of my coffee into my mouth, I swallowed it and it scalded my tongue. The pain was exactly what I needed to wake me up and my eyes watered slightly. Shaking the pain away I caught a glimpse of what the waitress next to us was…thinking I guess.

_Oh god I hope I look good, at least better than that blonde he's with…he's too good for her, the little trailer trash whore._

I quirked an eyebrow and began to giggle at the girl who was now on the other side of the restaurant, "Oh, man."

"What is it?"

I continued to giggle and then pointed my thumb at the girl, "that redhead thinks you're hot."

He gave me an unsure but calculating look, "I…do not understand."

Smirking I leaned forwards, "She thinks that _you_ are fine, good looking, attractive. She lusts over you; she wants to jump your bones."

"Jump…my bones?"

I shook with laughter at his ignorance of our terms, my hand hit the table a few times before coming back up to rub the right side of my neck, "she wants to fuck you."

He sighed and sat back in his seat, "I will never get used to your bluntness."

My hand followed the trail of stars that started on the base of the right side of my neck and trickled down across my chest and then my breast and ended just below my bosom. Of course I didn't follow them that far, just to the neck of my shirt and I smirked at Cas, "well…if you plan on sticking around with me, you better get used to it."

"Alright, alright, we've established that you know what people are thinking…all that's left now is getting used to it."

I shrugged, not really caring, I assume tuning everything out would be an option and I had years of practice with that skill. When Sam's your twin…tuning out is a good skill to learn…even better when both of them are especially irritating.

"We should get back to town…I want to get a session in before I have to leave again."

"Jesus Ch-."

"Don't finish that sentence," he warned me and I growled at him.

"Don't finish that sentence," I mocked him while I stood and slapped a couple of bills on the table and started to walk away, "what's the big bad Angel gonna do? Smite me?" I muttered, knowing full well that Cas could hear everything I was saying and I intended on him hearing too.

I straddled the bike just as he exited the diner, acting as if he hadn't heard a thing and I called out over the rumbling of my engine, "where to?"

"Junkyard," was all he said and then disappeared.

I shook my head at the usual "session" place and then tore out of the parking lot.

* * *

When I pulled in, Cas was already standing there as if he'd been there for hours. Dismounting, I shook out my chest length blonde hair and strode over to stand right in front of him, I smiled, "What are you teaching me today?"

"We're going over fighting skills today," he said giving me an "any argument" look while he took his trench off and I shook my head.

"I don't need to go over this; I've been fighting since I was eight."

He didn't smile but the corner of his lips lifted and he patted my shoulder, "amuse me."

"Well okay," I said taking off my hoodie, "but when I kick your ass, don't say I didn't warn you." And with that I lunged at him, expecting him to be caught off guard but instead he blocked all of my shots except a quick knee to his gut where he doubled over and as I was about to kick out his legs he grabbed mine, throwing me off balance and I fell on my back.

He advanced on me with a slightly dangerous look and I stuck out my legs, kicking him away and using the momentum to roll backwards onto my feet only to be thrown backwards into a car by an invisible force.

"Not fair!" I cried out before rolling to the side, dodging another attack from him. I spun around and punched him in the side and kicked out the back of his knee where he stumbled into the side of the car. I was about to attack once more but he was in front of me and he placed his first two fingers to my forehead and instantly, I fell to my knees and slumped over.

I was revived minutes later and I sat up to see Castiel crouched down beside me. "You fight dirty," I groaned, "You can't use your powers when I don't even know what mine is yet."

"That will come in time, and I never said I would fight fair. Do you think a Demon's going to waste time setting rules, _no_, he's going to attack."

I glared at him while I stood, dusting my jeans off, "and that little sleep trick, I wasn't even prepared."

"You won't have time to prepare its fight or die if you're protecting yourself or others, you should always be on alert."

I sighed heavily and looked at him through my messy hair, "yeah…you're right. Hey when will you teach me that sleep trick?"

He paused for a moment before putting his trench back on, "I will show you in time…when you prove to be ready…but as for your fighting…you aren't bad, you're a little slow with reaction times but that will get better, and your hits are hard and consistent, which are good things, keep that up. With practice your speed will increase."

I smirked to myself, _an Angel just complimented me._

"You can thank my brothers for being able to hit, they kept me in practice," I smiled.

He nodded, "I will thank them, but I should go. It's getting darker out…and you should head back too, before it get's later."

Again he disappeared as I got to my motorcycle and I snorted, "Good luck getting into Hell to thank Dean."

* * *

About forty-five minutes later I rolled into town and happened to pass my friend Des's house, only to find that her place was swarmed with the fire department, an ambulance and the police department, detectives and all. _What the hell?_ I thought and I took a sharp turn, cutting off a pickup truck in the process to get to her house. I parked the bike in a sloppy way and shoved through the crowd to get to the front where the caution tape was pulled taught.

"What's going on?" I asked the nearest person and they turned to me with tears in their eyes.

"I live next door to the young woman that lived there…it was awful, I heard her screams of pain and horror in my own house and I tried to get inside but the doors were locked tight…there was no getting in or out."

I gave a look of horror, "what do you mean 'lived' ma'am, she's okay isn't she?"

The older woman looked at me with pure sorrow and took my hand in hers, "No, I'm afraid she's passed on, honey. Was she a friend of yours?"

My lip quivered and a subtle shaking took over my body, gently I pulled my hand away and before I said anything to her I ripped the tape up and over myself and booked it across the front lawn. Past all the Firefighters, and the Police men that tried to stop me I burst into the house and tore up the stairs, tripping a few times. The fear screamed inside of me, my head was bursting with the thoughts that I had, my heart pounded against my rip cage and angry tears were threatening to fall.

Finally I got to the top and narrowly dodged a pair of hands that had tried to grab me and hold me back. As fast as I could, I ran to Des's bedroom, the only one where the detectives were and I squeezed through to the front of the people, immediately wishing that I hadn't because the sight before me made vomit creep up my throat and I gagged. My hand went to my mouth and my eyes darted around, ignoring the vomit struggling to come up, I screamed in horror as the sight began its path of disturbing me.

Before me, what used to be the body of one of my best friends was now a shredded mess of skin, organs and blood strewn about across the bed, walls and floor. The sheets were now nothing but the colour of drying blood and from here I could see that her eyes were open and full of horror. The mirror was cracked in the middle and her possessions were broken or destroyed in an obvious struggle…but the last thing I saw, and what I now realized was the true reason why the detectives tried to keep me out was the message across her wall, and I only saw this as they began to drag my shattered, horror stricken, confused mess of a body out.

"You've been warned, Winchester. We're coming."


	7. Take away my Pain

Chapter Six: Take away my Pain

Meanwhile in a few states over, inside of a motel with no significance to the others that the two men usually checked into, Castiel decided to pop in.

"What the hell Cas?" One cried out in irritation as Castiel had appeared right in front of the television that he had been watching.

The outburst caused the other to look up from the series of books he had been reading, "Hey Cas."

"Dude! Watching T.V here!"

Castiel turned his head to look down at the moving screen, "oh," and he moved, "shouldn't you be…helping your brother, Dean?"

He turned his head to look at Sam, "Ah, I'll leave the nerd boy with his books."

The only one who saw the glare and eye roll was Castiel and he hardly acknowledged it at all.

"They aren't books, they're Dani's journals."

At this statement, Dean turned around fully to look at his brother, "why are you reading her diary? See this is why she likes me better, I don't read her diary."

Sam gave him an incredulous look, "you're a liar, and how would you have known her high school crush otherwise!"

Dean shrugged, "she never found out that I did read it."

"That's because you blamed it on me," Sam mumbled and Dean laughed loudly.

"Both of you stop, if you're worried about her, she's fine."

"How would you know?"

"She's quite safe where she is, trust me."

There was a long pause of silence before it was broken by Sam, "You know where she is, you've known all along," he stated, slamming the book he was currently looking at, closed.

Dean turned off the television and looked up at Castiel, "where's Dani, Cas?"

Castiel sighed, rubbing a hand over his face, "She resides in Jackson, Tennessee."

* * *

The bar was as it always was at night, noisy…so why on Earth did I come here of all places to go and suffer. Why didn't I just go home, where I could be at peace, without all the noise in the background? Not only was their the clanking of glasses and clinking of pool cues hitting the balls, but the voices were overwhelming… at least I thought they were actual voices…because knowing how skittish my mind was lately, it was probably their thoughts because I just couldn't focus enough on tuning them all out, so instead…I just let them go on, barely listening to them at all.

With everything going on, first Dean and then Sam and I…I thought the pain was over, I thought the heartbreak would end, I thought I was finally over all of the suffering that my whole life has only ever had. I thought that with leaving Sam it would finally be the end, and I could live the normal life that everyone that I have ever known has lived. No, that's not the case though, pain, suffering and death follow me like a shadow, wherever I go, it follows bringing the same suffering I have felt to the friends that I make.

All of this, everything that's happened since I got to Jackson, there's been more crime now than there ever has been, two murders in the past three weeks, both unsolved. Why is it that unfortunate things always happen to me and my family? What did we do to deserve this misery? Maybe it's what Dad always used to say, "Whether you run or not, your problems will always find you again, your best chance against them is to fight, and Pray to God that you don't die in the process."

I called the bartender for another Whisky glass and told him to leave the bottle and again I sat there with my hand around the glass, occasionally taking sips from the strong liquid and waiting as the burning sensation slipped down my throat. As the burn came and came again my mind wandered back to the crime scene and I begged myself not to. Flashes of blood and gore crossed my mind, the reflection of the broken mirror flashed before my eyes and from the little I could see of Des's face I saw terror and pain. It was like I could feel her anguish course through my veins and I couldn't help but wonder if she begged for her life, did those sons of bitches laugh in her face?

I bet she didn't even know what it was that took her life.

That's the saddest part of all, not the fact that she was a friend, not the obvious horror she endured or her screams of terror, it's the fact that she didn't know what it was that was tearing her apart, ripping her insides to ribbons. No one knows what's out there, no one knows, and no one would believe it if they were told.

I just can't save everyone.

I had forgotten about the glass a while ago and was drinking straight from the bottle only to find that it was now empty. I grumbled and slid it away and was about to call for another when the side of my breast buzzed and I reached down to grab the phone from my laced fabric that held the phone to my skin.

I sighed as I flicked it open and placed it against my ear, "yeah..?"

An urgently worried but slightly irritated voice came to me, "where are you?"

Looking around half heartedly I drew out the sentence, "uh…not anywhere important."

"Come find me…it's urgent."

There was a click and I pulled the phone away to see that it was an "unknown" number, "who was that?" I muttered before placing the phone back in my dress and pulling out a couple of bills and slapping them down before making my way out the door of the bar, my slouch boots making a noisy exit.

Straddling the bike and kicking it into gear I paused, "I probably shouldn't ride this anywhere…" The pause continued for a moment longer before I was startled by a very familiar junk yard crossing my vision and I growled loudly, "God damn you Cas, it's too late for another _fucking_ session."

I thought about ignoring his request and going home but I decided against it because I knew all to well I'd wake up with him in my room…and then the bitching would begin.

Choosing to keep my ears from being scolded raw, I revved the engine and took a sharp turn out of the parking lot, driving over a couple of curbs on the way.

* * *

After killing the engine I sat on the bike with my face in my hands. _I don't want to be here, just want to go home_. I scrubbed at my face before standing and then slowly, I made my way over to the figure that stood many feet away.

When I was about five feet from him I stopped walking and stood there, just staring at him and I only spoke his name.

"Have you been drinking?" he asked me.

Looking away in an "I don't care" manner I shrugged and sauntered off, "what's it to you?" I shot back at him while I leaned against a car, glowering at him.

"It wasn't safe of you to drive yourself here after you've been drinking," Castiel told me while he came closer.

I shrugged, still not really caring, "oh well, what do you want me to do? Go back in time and correct my error?"

He stood there for a few long moments, not saying anything to address my remark while he looked at me with that calculating gaze of his. It felt like the day we first met again, like he was staring into my soul, trying to understand me by looking into my eyes.

"What's wrong?"

I sighed in irritation and gave him a look, "Cas…personal space bubble, remember? We talked about this."

He looked at the foot of space between us and took a step back, "My apologies, but you seem angry tonight, you're not usually this moody."

"I'm just not in a good mood," I snapped, "just leave it at that, obviously you needed me for something because otherwise I wouldn't _be_ here right now."

Castiel shook his head and sighed, "there's something on your mind, isn't there? It's best to talk about it."

Giving him the darkest glare I could muster I snapped at him, "I'm tired, I'm pissed and all I want to do is wallow in my self misery. I've got way too much on my mind, I scared the shit out of my best friend, I talk to Angels, I hunt Demons and I READ PEOPLE'S MINDS! I'm just a little stressed, but you wouldn't know about any of it because Angels don't _feel_ anything."

"Why are you so angry with me?" and the way his eyes looked at me, I almost broke because they reminded me so much of Sam.

"If you had of been here for the past week instead of fucking off all the time when I need you the most, maybe you'd understand _why_ I'm angry."

With this I began to walk back to my bike, ready to just get out of here, get out of this town and away from all the misery in this world. I just want to run, run far away from here and all of my problems, I don't want to fight, I don't know how much fight I've got left in me anymore. I've lost everything, my mom, my dad, Dean and I've pretty much lost Sam. I've got no one now, and the friends I've made…they're being picked off, one by one. Someone out there is making damn sure that I will never have anyone in my life; they're making it my destiny to be alone forever.

"Dani!" He called out in that tone that I could never say no to, "Something happened didn't it?"

I stopped at his words and just stood there in the incredulity of it all, everything that's happened and I still manage to find something to keep me going, how do I find the strength for it all, how do I keep going, how can I anymore?

The tears fell down my cheeks and I rubbed them away harshly as a breeze blew the skirt of my dress away from my knees, and I turned back around to face the Angel, the anguish quite evidently shown on my face, "one of my _best_ friends died last week…and I saw her. I saw what was left of her body and I could barely make out her face, her body was _ripped_ to shreds, Cas. It was destroyed, and her insides were _everywhere_! I never thought I'd have to see it again, I NEVER WANTED TO SEE IT AGAIN. It's not fair that it happened to her, why her? Why anyone? WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME?!"

"I'm sorry."

The way he said it…it seemed that he was so uncaring about it…like it didn't even matter anymore, and it set me off all over again, "YOU DON'T GET IT DO YOU? She _died_ because of _me_, Cas! BECAUSE OF ME, who ever that was there when it happened, they wrote a message after their FUCKING MUTTS were finished with my friend-."

Suddenly Cas was in front of me with his hands on my shoulders, "what did they say, it's important that you tell me."

I gave him a teary eyed look and choked out, "You've been warned Winchester, we're coming." I pulled his hands off of me and began to walk away again, the sobs beginning to rock my body and soon enough my wails were heard in the silence as I cried my sorrows out to the moon.

"I'm just so sick of it; I'm sick and tired of it all. I _hate_ my life, Cas. Everything in it, all that's good in it, it never lasts it's not meant to last, not with me nor with my family. FUCK, all the pain, the sorrow the ANGUISH it's ripping me apart, I look in the mirror and I hardly recognize myself anymore, I'm not the person I used to be, I've lost too much and I'm becoming colder every day. I miss my mother and my dad, I miss my brothers, and I miss EVERYTHING that I used to have."

Cas was looking at me in a way that invited me to go on, and I did go on, I was going to lay down all my heart's anguish on him, I just needed to tell someone, someone who would understand, "I miss them, oh god I miss them. Sam and Dean, I miss them SO MUCH! It breaks my heart every day, I think about them both EVERYDAY and maybe…just _maybe_ if something had gone differently, if I had _done_ something, then maybe Dean would still be alive, and I'd be with them, fighting demons and spirits like I should be, and the people that have died in this town, they'd be alive. They wouldn't know me, and I wouldn't have brought the nightmares I've been fighting all my life to them, and they could continue on living in their ignorant world and be normal. Something I never was. I left Sam, I _left him_ because I couldn't _deal_ with Dean's death, every waking hour of every day I spent trying to get Dean out, but the only thing I was doing was keeping the wound open, and throwing salt in it. I just needed to leave, to get away. All I want to do is RUN, run as far as I can and never look back. I'm sick of this life, Cas. I hate it all, I'm tired of the Demons and the Angels, and I'm tired of being the Key to it all. I want out; I just want to be free from it all. I just want everything in this world to be okay again."

After getting everything out, I continued to stand there, staring at Castiel with my chest heaving for the needed breath. I never imagined in my whole life that it would feel _this_ good to get everything off of my shoulders; it was a weight that had just sprouted wings and flew away.

"I…I'm sorry, I didn't -."

"Didn't know? Of course you didn't, you never asked. You should remember this though Cas, I'm human. I feel a whole lot more than you do, you can't keep piling things on me, because otherwise I'm going to explode like I just did…now I really have to go. I'm even more tired than I was, I have a long drive ahead of me and I just need to relax and let all of these feelings blow over."

"Wait Dani, there was a reason that I called you-," Castiel began and I interrupted him.

"Yeah, I know. Another training session? Just save it until the morning, we'll do an extra long one…just let me sleep."

I began to walk away once again as Castiel called out to me and just as I got to my bike a pair of headlights flicked on and casted their glow over me.

I turned with the expression of a deer caught in the headlights and I became angry all over again, "Why the hell'd you go and get an audience for Castiel? No one needs to know our business for fuck sakes!"

Turning to the car I yelled at the occupant, "ALRIGHT SHOWS OVER! Go back to wherever the FUCK you came from!" Turning around again I heard car doors open and a voice called my name.

"DANI!"

I stopped with a hand on the handle bar of my motorcycle and I started to shake uncontrollably. Great, now not only am I emotionally and mentally unstable I'm hearing things, just fucking, "great."

"Dani?"

I spun around to face the two men framed by the lights and it took a while before the surprise could set in, "S-Sam? _Dean_?"

They were looking at me with their own pain on their face, Sam with his wide eyes and I could see from here that his hands were clenching and unclenching slowly, I knew that was what he did when he was trying to keep his emotions in check. Swallowing hard I turned my head to the right and Dean stood there in his typically fashioned black T-shirt, all cool like he had always seemed to be for my entire life, but from here I could see the shine in his eyes.

_You little fucker, shed tears for me…I'm gonna tear you limb from limb._

"You..you're dead! I SAW YOU DIE!"

Dean started for a second and then took a step forward, "Dani…"

"No…NO, your soul was dragged to HELL by the HELL HOUNDS, you were ripped apart in front of us!"

"Dani, he's back. It's okay. He's alive again," Sam spoke and the both of them started to come closer and I screamed.

"NO, get the FUCK away from me you bastards. HOW DARE YOU TAKE HIS BODY, HOW DARE YOU. I'm going to tear you LIMB FROM FUCKING LIMB, you take my brother away from me, THEN YOU FUCKING TAUNT ME WITH HIS BODY!!!"

I jumped onto the bike ready to high tail it out of there and then Dean was running and he was suddenly in front of the bike, his hands grabbing the handles, "Dani, it's _me._ Your brother, I'm not possessed."

Whipping out a knife from my boot I raised my hand to strike but his hand caught my wrist and we fought for domination before my other hand slid to the bottle of holy water and I twisted the cap off before dashing him in the face with it. He stopped to spit out some of the water and I dropped the knife in surprise.

"Why aren't you burning you fucker," I hissed in anger.

"Because I'm not a Demon, Danielle."

"LIAR!" I screamed and I was just served the revelation of a lifetime.

With my outburst a force emitted from my body and the son of a bitch was sent flying into the air where he landed twenty feet away from me in a heap.

I shot up from my bike and grabbed the knife from the grass before heading over to the heap on the ground.

"I'm going to kill you, you son of a bitch. And I'm going to make it slow, and painful…and I'm going to enjoy every. Last. Second."

Before I could even reach it, I was grabbed around the waist and held back, the knife knocked from my hand. I struggled like a cornered animal, ripping my body from side to side but the arms held on tight.

"Dan, Dani, DANIELLE! Stop… stop, stop it."

"No, get off of me, get off. Let go of me!" I wailed, digging my nails into the bared skin of the person's arms.

"Ouch, Dani stop it. It's really Dean, Dani. It's him, he's back everything's okay.

"Get off of me, Sam. I'm gonna kill that bastard for making me suffer all over again."

Trying to lunge out of Sam's grip I was stopped short because it only tightened and the tears started pouring again, "No, just, let go of me. Please, just let go."

Castiel decided to step in at that moment, after watching the drama go down, "Danielle, listen."

"NO!"

"No, I mean _listen_ Dani, use your mind."

I turned my head to look at the thing in front of me that was now getting to its feet, and with a slight hunch it held out its hand in an attempt at getting me to stop.

There was a pause in my struggling and then silence in the air until voices flooded into my head and I focused on one.

_Why can't she see that it's me? I'm not a demon or a shapeshifter. Please, please just listen to me Dani, listen to what I have to say. Forget everything that Dad taught you…that I taught you, and just listen before you shoot._

I broke away from Sam's arms and my breath came out in loud gasping heaves, my fists held in tight balls at my sides, "if you really are Dean. Tell me something…that only Dean would know about me."

He looked up at me through his eyelashes, his own breath coming back in gasps, "when…when you were fourteen…you were attacked by a werewolf… and Dad thought there was no point in you enrolling at the new school….your first boyfriend…he beat you up behind the school when you wouldn't have sex with him then and there, I found him hurting you and kicked his ass. I stayed with you once he left…I held you and let you cry."

Looking down at him, my lip quivered and from here I could see the shine in his eyes and as one single tear fell down his cheek, and at that second I knew it was him.

"Please believe me Dani, it's really me."

"D-Dean?" I choked out, as more tears began to flood my cheeks, and I ran to him as fast as I could. He barely had enough time to prepare himself before I had thrown myself into his body with my arms wrapped around him as tight as they would go without hurting him. He caught me just in time and I felt his arms wrap around my body and I took in everything.

Being able to see and feel him, to smell him was overwhelming. I never thought that I would _ever_ get to see him again, to hug him again, to hear his voice ever again.

"I missed you so much, Dean. You have no idea how much I missed you."

He shushed and continued to hold me, "okay, okay. Everything's fine now, I'm here, I'm okay."

Pulling away slightly I grabbed his face between my hands and looked him over, studying every aspect, every curve, just everything about him that I could see in my position, "you are okay, everything looks fine. Nothing seems out of place, you're all in one piece…" and I pulled him into another hug again.

I could feel him smile against my hair and I heard it too, "alright, it's been a long night, we should probably go back to our respectable places-,"

I jumped in, "Nonsense, stay with me. I can make room for you in my apartment just let me get my bike and I'll take you-."

"No," both Sam and Dean interrupted and Sam continued, "you're tired and like Cas said, you've been drinking."

"I'll take her bike," Cas said, "it'll be in your usual spot by morning, I promise. Go with your brothers, at least I'll know you're safe."

I gave him a strange look, "did…did you do this?" I asked, pointing in Dean's direction.

Castiel gave me a sort of smile, "we'll discuss this in the morning."

Nodding, I made my way over to the Impala and settled into the back seat, the other two joining me minutes later.

"I'm going to wake up in the morning, and this is all going to be a dream. You won't be there," I smiled sleepily to myself, "but that's okay. I'll enjoy it while it lasts. Winchesters reunited."


	8. Convincing not only myself

Chapter Seven: Convincing not only myself

I lay on the bed in the pitch black, not awake, but not asleep either. My eyes were closed in an effort to block the muffled sounds coming from the living room because even those were making my head pound. I was sensitive enough to sound on a normal day; it was four times as bad when I was hung over.

There was a pause in my thoughts as I listened to the sounds, ignoring the pain my head was in my eyes shot open and I tried to swallow through the dryness of my throat. The pain was unbearable as I tried to go back into yesterday; maybe I'd remember some important information that would lead me to an answer as to _why_ my living room was so noisy this…what I assumed was morning.

That's when it came to me, everything that had happened last night…well almost everything. I didn't remember how I got to bed and I had no idea how I got into the boxers and tank top I was wearing, but that was beside the point because somehow there were people in my living room…and no one else has a key besides Ryder and I'm pretty sure he's still freaked out at me.

Slowly, I dragged myself up into a sitting position, my back arched as I slouched over and the sounds of the disks cracking ran all the way up my spine. I sat there looking around blearily, my tongue felt like a thick, swollen piece of sandpaper and I scratched the top of my breast. Throwing my feet over the side of the bed I sat there for a few more seconds before standing and shuffling out the door and into the bathroom. I returned seconds later and appeared at the hall opening that brought me to the living room and I guess what was a dining room.

I stretched once again and caught a brief glimpse of two men sitting at my table and I was about to turn towards my stereo to turn on some tunes when I quickly spun around, taking a major double take. I guess my memory clicked into place quite obviously because Sam chuckled and I launched myself at the both of them, grabbing both to me with an arm around each of their necks causing Dean to stumble out of the chair just in time to catch himself.

"I thought it _was_ a dream," I breathed into both of their ears and then let them go before dancing away and into the kitchen. The series of sudden movements did nothing for my splitting headache so I had to immediately halt the aggressive movements to press my forehead against the cold surface of the counters.

I groaned loudly and from the other room I heard Dean's obnoxious laugh, the one he saved for mine and Sam's stupidity. I stumbled back out into the living area with a tall glass of orange juice and a bottle of aspirin and set them on the table between the two.

"You. Shut up, I don't need to hear you this early in the morning."

"It's eleven o'clock." Sam stated, slightly shocked that I could still sleep in all day.

Pointing a finger at him I made my point clear, "exactly, and I don't even have to be at work today."

Sam was about to retaliate when a very loud, sharp knock rung through the apartment, the familiar melody hit me and I groaned, "Jesus CHRIST, quit fucking KNOCKING and get your ass in here. The door's open." My hand held my head and I disappeared into the bathroom for a quick second and when I came back Ryder stood in my living room. A look of anger mixed with slight worry and sharp anguish was on his face and the intensity of it made me falter a little.

"Where the _fuck_ have you been?"

"Dude, your knocking could have woken the dead." I stated simply before heading to the table and unscrewing the pills, anxious to ease the throbbing.

I could feel him eyeing me with the bottle of pills and an angry sigh escaped him, "you were _drinking_ last night? I've been trying to get a hold of you _all night_ and you've been out drinking your life away and doing _god_ knows what with these two." He growled at me, pointing at the two sitting at the table.

I quickly swallowed four or five pills and my eyebrows, "oh really? Cause you've only avoided me for the past week, why am I so special _now_?" I scoffed.

"Is this what you're gonna do now? Every time you feel like shit you're just going to drink yourself into a stupor, every time you're in pain you're just going to turn to alcohol? Is that it? When you're feeling too _fucking_ sorry for yourself you're just going to _wallow_ in _self misery_?"

For a split second I had the flashback of being fifteen and coming home at three in the morning, drunk for the first time in my life. Dean nearly tore me a new ass hole with his bitching and complaining, and the _nagging_ he did…it was worse than Dad and what was even _better_ was that the next morning he hid the fucking aspirin.

"Eat me."

"What the FUCK is your problem? Do you even know why I was trying to get a hold of you last night?"

"NO I don't know, RYDER. And frankly I don't want to because if all you're going to do is bitch at me…well you can just get the FUCK out because CLEARLY I'M IN NO FUCKING MOOD!"

"I'm worried about you, I thought you were dead in a FUCKING DITCH because you weren't answering your phone, and I needed your help."

"Oh, ho! You needed _my help_? Really, cause that's new. YOU NEVER NEED MY HELP, and who the FUCK are you, my _mother_?" I snapped wildly at him and then my voice hitched higher in mockery, "Where were you, when will you be home, who were you with, what were you doing?"

"I'm not a goddamn child; I'm quite capable in wiping my own ass!"

The two of us stood there, breathing heavily and staring the other down and he looked away first in what I hope was in shame.

"Now what the hell is _your_ problem, thinking you can just waltz in here and start bitching at me because I didn't answer my phone…I don't answer it a lot and you've never given me hell for it before. What's _wrong_?"

I continued to stand there, staring at him and I didn't notice a reaction until his shoulder slumped forward with his head hung, and then I noticed the quivering.

Taking a step forward with my hand reached out my tone changed dramatically, "…Ryder?"

The soft sobbing reached my ears and a similar, but much more muscular form crossed my mind, the vision of Sam when we buried Dean.

"What's happened?"

His head lifted and I saw the redness of his eyes and how puffy they were, he grabbed my shoulder and I barely winced at the pressure of it.

"She's gone, Dani. She's gone." He mumbled, his body tipping forward and I pushed my hand against his chest in an attempt to keep him straight.

The hand on his chest clenched the fabric into a clump and my voice changed further into one that would coax a frightened animal from a cage, "Who's gone?"

"Penny," he wailed loudly, "she's dead."

Horror struck my face and I sucked in a sharp breath, "Wh-what?"

He sniffed loudly, "they found her last night. When I got the call it was late in the afternoon a-and by the time I got there it was too late."

"Oh God Ryder, I'm so sorry," I murmured, my hand rested against his neck.

His knees buckled and he sunk to the ground, pulling me with him and once we were still he crushed my body to his and his face buried into my hair, "She's gone, Dani. My little sister is gone."

All I could do was hold him, the soothing sounds doing absolutely nothing to calm his nerves. Sam, Dean and I shared a look and my mouth twitched, my own tears falling from my eyes and I squeezed them tightly, my arms responding in the same way as they gripped his shoulders tighter.

"Shh, shh. Just let it go, let it out Ryder. It's going to be okay, everything will be fine."

I think that deep down those spoken words were not entirely directed at just Ryder, somehow, I was trying to convince myself of the same thing. After a while his sobbing quietened and the tears quit flowing, but now we just knelt there, holding each other. Well, it was more of me holding him but I was using his body for balance, and my hand slowly ran through the brown strands.

His head rose from my shoulder and he looked at me with his still puffy, red eyes, "Where were you last night?"

I sighed and my thumbs rubbed his tears away, "I was busy…you know the drill."

"You're always busy," he mumbled and I grumbled to myself.

"Ryder…"

He looked like a wounded puppy and again many images of Sam shot past my vision, "it's just that…I needed you last night and you were no where to be found."

I used his shoulder to push myself up, "I had my own problems to deal with."

"At the bar?"

I stopped with the empty juice glass in hand and the bottle of pills in the other, my eyes were closed and I really wanted to throw something.

Deciding to change the subject I turned back around, "Ryder, you've heard of my brother's Sam and Dean… Dean, partner in crime…that's Ryder, the best friend that makes it really hard to be friends with sometimes."

There was silence while I dumped the objects in the kitchen and when I returned, Ryder was flabbergasted, the previous sorrow forgotten, "But you said that…"

_Dean was dead._

I smiled, "I know," and then I pushed him towards a seat, "sit."

"Wait…did you just."

_Read my mind…again?_

"Yes I did, and the story about Dean's rise from the dead will be told another day. It is extremely long…and I don't even know half of it."

"So…if you can read my mind…what am I thinking now?"

I stared at him and he stared back, I smirked, "you're thinking about Fruit Loops."

"Damn. You have any?"

"No."

"But why not? They're the best thing in the world."

My face screwed up in disgust, "they're disgusting…it's like eating sugar for breakfast."

"And you're point is?" Ryder and Dean both asked and I gave them strange looks.

"Neither of you need sugar in the morning."

Silence fell upon us after Ryder nor Dean found a counter argument against me and I decided to end the eeriness of it all, "Ryder…you need to tell me everything that happened last night. Most importantly…we need to find out _who_ did it."

Ryder was grim for a moment before speaking, "well the "who did it" part is easy…it was Matt."


	9. One of us

Chapter Eight: One of us.

Leaning back in my chair I stared from across the table at my best friend, Matt's name echoed in my head and I didn't say anything for the longest time. It just didn't sit right with me, Matt wouldn't hurt a fly let alone his girlfriend…Christ, the two were practically married. There wasn't a motive; a reason…Matt loved Penny with everything he had…or so he had told me.

"Ryder…some how I don't think you have your facts together…Matt would _never_ hurt her, he was in love with her…head over heals for her."

He glared defiantly at me and huffed in disagreement, "look, I know that you didn't like him. But that doesn't give you a reason to accuse the guy of murder, Ryder." I stated.

"When did I say I didn't like him? I just thought she could do better than him…he was too…"

I interrupted him, "too what Ryder? I didn't think he was a bad guy…a little soft around the edges but definitely someone who could be relied upon…some one to raise a family with."

Ryder wouldn't look at me when he spoke, "well, it was him because when I got to his house the cops were dragging him out in handcuffs…the blood still on his hands."

I couldn't argue with hard evidence like that but something still didn't seem right to me, he told me a few weeks ago that he was going to _propose_ to her, make it all romantic and stuff. Now… he's the prime suspect for her _murder_ with her blood literally all over his hands.

_Something's missing from all of this…_

"There has to be something else…anything Ryder. Did Matt say anything, did he look… I don't know, confused or something? Unsure, maybe?"

Ryder glared at the table, "No…all he did was scream that he didn't do it, he couldn't remember…I was too busy trying to get past the cops to kill him…witnesses be damned."

I crossed my arms over my chest and chewed at my lip, an action reserved for thought or shot nerves, in this case it was thought. I stood and went to my room to dress, coming out in a pair of baggy jeans holding a tank top and a sleeveless hoodie. I only had my bra on…and had no qualms with walking out half dressed; they've all seen it before. I placed the shirts on the couch arm and walked into the kitchen to grab a slice of bread and peanut butter.

"When'd you get those wings?"

"Hurrph?" I called back, my mouth full.

"On your back?"

I arched my eyebrow and swallowed hard, "Oh, those…I've had them for a while now…I thought you've seen them."

"Maybe I have…I don't remember."

I came back into the room chuckling, "you have worse memory than I do."

"You have more ink than a girl should have…"Dean grumbled, a miserable look taking over the features of his face. Whereas Sam's reaction was of curiosity,

"Those characters…what do they mean?"

I looked up after pulling the tank top over my head, "These?" I asked while placing my hands over my hip bones.

Sam nodded and I shrugged, "The left one means Fighter," and then I smiled a little to myself, "but the one on the right means Family."

My brother's didn't say anything about my ink afterwards…I'm sure I'd get an earful from Dean when Ryder was gone. The room was silent once again as I pulled on the sweater and zipped it up half way and then Ryder asked where I was going.

"_We_ are going to go to Matt's house."

He gave me an unsure look, "to do what?"

I gave him an "are you stupid" look, "uh…to get some answers, duh! We're breaking in."

"And you do this often…breaking the law I mean?" Ryder raised his eyebrows.

"Sure do, part of the Job…besides Ryder, live a little." I shot back at him while sneaking a look with my brothers, only to snap my head back when I noticed the shared look between them.

"What?"

Sam smirked at me, "Oh nothing, just Dean told you to "live a little" when we were thirteen."

I quirked an eyebrow, "I know…and you just went along with it. Another game of Follow the Leader for you, I assume?"

"Oh shut up."

I turned back to face Ryder, my own look of smugness that I had picked up from Dean graced my face, "my twin is a kiss ass."

Ryder smiled a nostalgic one, "You two act like Brother and Sister."

"Sure do," I replied before walking over to the far corner of the living room, "just don't get us fighting…you might want to duck for cover if that happens," I finished before crouching down behind the table and opening a little nook in the wall. Fishing around in there for a few moments I came back out with two boxes and a pair of wrapped bundles and placed them on the table.

"What's that?" Ryder asked from behind me and I unwrapped one.

"Guns?" He stated, his voice going up a notch.

"Mmhmm, what'd you think we were going to do, go in unprotected?"

He picked one of the weapons up from the table and studied it, "what the hell do we need to be protected from?"

"Demons, you dumbass!" I snapped at him, ready to knock him out with his own gun, "What do we need to be protected from he asks," I mocked, popping bullets into the holes.

"Don't mock me."

"Well don't be a moron, then."

He glared at the back of my head and I chose to ignore it, "you know how to shoot right?"

"Yeah…my grandfather taught me when I used to go-."

"Good, great. I don't need to know your life story; I just asked if you can shoot."

Another glare was shot at me and I smirked to myself, "to be completely honest, I shouldn't even bring you with me…too dangerous for an amateur like yourself, but…how will you learn if I don't?"

"What about them?" Ryder asked, pointing at my brothers.

I turned to them but spoke to Ryder, "they're going to stay here to wait for Cas in case he comes…alright?"

Sam nodded, knowing that I would be fine, but Dean on the other hand was uneasy with the idea of me going into a hunt basically alone.

"Dean, relax," I smiled, "I'll be fine, don't worry about it."

"I hate the idea of you going alone…one of us should really cover for you."

"Ryder's a Hunter now; he's got to feel his way through some time."

I took Dean's silence as a tentative okay and nodded, "alright, Ryder, let's go."

"Dude, we taking your bike?"

"We are."

"Can I-."

"No, you're riding bitch, now shut your trap and let's go."

I had to endure his bitching and complaining all the way down the stairs.

_**Author's Note:**_** Well isn't that something, two updates in two days? I bet you guys are happy, the only reason for this is because I probably won't be writing for a few days…with tomorrow being Christmas and all.**

** I'd like to apologize for the amount of swearing in last chapter, the scene kind of called for it, and that's just Dani's character for you, the language was pretty good in this one, but there probably will be chapters like the previous one in the future…just for a heads up!**

** I'd like to thank Alexitonic for her review on the previous chapter.**

**Merry Christmas, and happy Holidays, Enjoy!**

**Xoxo- LoveIsAlways.**


	10. Next on the List

Chapter Nine: Next on the list

I watched as a pair of police officers exited the front of the house and listened intently for the rumble of their engine and then as it ebbed away from the distance between us. Pausing for a moment longer and then nodding towards Ryder who stood behind me in the narrow alley between the garage where Matt's Volvo still sat and the neighbour's fence. Stealthily we manoeuvred ourselves to behind the wall of the house where I stood as tall as I could to peer into the window of the back bedroom.

Determining that the coast was clear I turned my attention to Ryder with a little smirk on my lips, "alright, let's get this show on the road, shall we?"

His worried tone met my ears as I eased open the latch with the handy pocket knife I always kept on me, "look… should we really be doing this? I mean, what if we get caught?"

"We won't," was my simple answer while I slid the soundless window up and open for us to enter.

"But how do you know?" His tone turned into a quite whine.

Sighing heavily I turned my body more towards him, "Do you want to find out what killed Penny or not?"

Ryder nodded and I clapped him on the shoulder, "everything's going to be fine, now shut up so we can get in there before the damn cops mess anything else up."

I threw the duffle bag I had brought through the window first and then launched myself at the windowsill and pulled myself up and through the open space, landing with as much of a graceful thump as I could get before standing again to look through the window, "will you hurry up and get in here you pansy assed mama's boy."

His reply came as a muffled "oh shut up" before he too launched through the window, but that was as far as he got as he couldn't pull himself further. I rolled my eyes at him and grabbed the back of his jacket to pull him through, and he landed with a louder thump than I did and more of a tangled mess too.

I shushed him loudly with my finger to my lips and headed down the hallway and into the living room, the duffle bag on my shoulder. I could smell the peroxide which meant that they had already cleaned the blood up but from what I could tell, the furniture hadn't been touched since the night she was killed. Walking into the kitchen, I placed the bag on the counter and started to go through it as Ryder walked through the house and out of the corner of my eye I saw him about to place his hands all over the walls and picture frames.

"Don't touch anything!" I hissed and his hand shot back like he'd touched acid or something.

"Alright, there you are my friend," I muttered to myself before pulling out my meter.

"What's that?" Ryder asked me as he came up behind me, peering over my shoulder at the strange looking device.

"Oh this?" I asked, holding it up more, "It's called an EMF meter," I told him before switching it on, only for it to act up like crazy.

I gave it an appalled look and Ryder asked me what it was doing. It took me a second to get over the shock of how much activity it was picking up before I spoke, "it… detects paranormal activity… you know like ghosts… and demons." I explained as I walked around the living room, pointing the device at certain areas only to have it act up more.

"Something's been in here…and not a good something either."

When I came close to one of the windows the meter practically jumped in my hands and I pulled back a second to run a finger across the ledge and then study the substance that had appeared, "sulphur…" I trailed off looking up at Ryder who had a confused look, "it means that a Demon's been here. They leave traces of sulphur along the edges of their entrances and exits." I finished my sentence in the kitchen where again the meter started to act crazy and I acknowledged the two areas where the Demon could have entered: the vent or the window. I peered at the window and found nothing and then I asked Ryder if he could run his finger along the vent slits.

When I could see that it was sulphur on his finger the probable line of events that took place last night came to mind and I kept silent.

"What does this mean, Dani?" Ryder asked me and I looked up at him.

"It means that-," _thump_, "what was that?"

In my hand the meter began to buzz and I looked at Ryder in horror, "get in the closet, _now_!" I hissed violently before shutting the meter off and shoving him towards the door. We barely made it inside before I heard the footsteps appear in the living room, and I closed the door so only a crack was visible. I pressed my finger to my lips and slowly pulled out the gun I had in the back of my jeans to point at it, silently asking him if he had his. Ryder nodded, wide eyed, his hand reaching to the back of his own jeans.

"Get it out, and get ready… we may have to fight." I whispered almost silently, and Ryder nodded, slipping his weapon out and in front of him.

"I swear, I saw them go in here! They went through the back window."

"Then where _are_ they?"

I listened quietly as two voices spoke outside of our current hiding place, maybe if we stayed silent I could acquire some more information about their plans, and what place this town had in it. I heard some more heavy foot steps in the living room, some shuffling of objects in the living room and then more voices came.

"They couldn't have escaped, there's no way they're that fast!"

"No, they're still here and _he's_ getting impatient."

I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, _who's he?_

"It's not _our _fault that she's so difficult to find! It's no wonder why we have to go after the random meat suits in this town!"

"Well, it's the _best we can do_ until she comes out of her little hiding place. That little Winchester bitch better come out soon, I'm sick of waiting."

"I thought you said last night's kill was fun?"

There was a pause before the other one spoke, "well, yeah. She was a screamer that one…and a bleeder, I enjoyed her suffering more than that other one."

I looked at Ryder who had gone unbelievably tense, and I placed a hand on his arm in warning. I knew all to well about his bursts of anger, and if he didn't calm down he'd blow our cover. Ryder returned the look and I saw what he was thinking,

_Penny…he killed her, it was him._

When I returned my attention back to our situation I realized that all was silent. The two demons had stopped walking, and they weren't saying anything either. I waited with baited breath as a pair of footsteps started back up once again, and they were getting closer to the closet. I swallowed, my grip tightening on the hilt of the gun and I spoke as quietly as I could, "when he opens the door, I'll open fire. _Do not_ shoot until I tell you to…I might be able to get some information out of these guys."

I waited, my gun pointing towards the door and my heart stopped for a split second when the door burst open, only to kick back into high gear not even a second later. I saw the black eyes and the evil smirk gracing his lips and my finger hesitated for a split second on the trigger before he lunged and I let a single shot fire, right through his shoulder and after that initial shot, they just kept going until there were six sizzling holes over his torso. When I realized I was out, he did too and came at me again, and I did the first thing that came to mind… I reared back and smashed the hilt of the gun into his check and lashed out with my leg, connecting with his groin.

Before he could stand again I leapt out of the closet and smashed my knee into his nose, when I was about to connect again his head reared back and a yell emitted from his mouth, black smoke joining it, only to exit the room through the vent. The body slumped to the ground and my head whipped to the side to get a glance of the other one, and I barely had time to duck when his fist came flying. Still in my bent position I tackled him into the counter, slamming the other side of his ribcage into the granite edge. After his initial shock of impact he wrestled me so our positions were switched and he now had me pinned to the counter and I felt as his fist connected with my face three times before I could get a decent blow to his stomach. When his hits halted for a second my own fist connected with the side of his face and then his nose and I switched hands so my left drove itself into his jaw. My knuckles screamed in pain as they split open and before I could rearrange my thoughts he tackled me into the kitchen table, his hand closed around my throat and squeezed.

I coughed and spluttered and finally managed a sentence before his hand closed tighter, "Ry-Ryder, shoot him. Shoot the fucker!" I rasped and out of the corner of my eye I saw him raise his gun.

"Don't bother boy," the Demon spoke, "you and I both know you haven't got the balls. Let the adults do the talking."

The single shot rung through the air and the Demon on top of me stumbled to the side, holding his neck. I coughed hard and jumped up, the gun long forgotten as I advanced on the Demon before me, pulling out a knife from my boot and pressing it to his already injured neck, my body pinning his to the counter.

"Why are you here?" my voice came out gravelly.

"To admire my handiwork," he sneered, "but they already cleaned up the blood…I guess we're both shit out of luck."

I pressed the knife into his throat and it sizzled, his hiss of distress brought a sick smile to my lips, "_what_ is your purpose here. Clearly you aren't killing off humans for pure entertainment."

"Why should I tell you anything, Miss. Winchester?"

Shoving my knee into his crotch I growled out, "Oh, its _Miss. Winchester_ now is it? I thought it was 'That Winchester bitch'?"

He leered knowingly at me, but said nothing and I pressed the holy water dipped knife deeper into his skin, "I want to know _why _you're here, who's this _he_ that's so impatient, and why the _fuck_ you seem to think you can go around killing my friends and not have me retaliate."

I paused so he could reply and when he didn't I added, "It's like you don't know me at all."

When he still wouldn't reply, I dug the knife in deeper and a choked gurgling sound came out, "are you someone's bitch now? They have you doing their dirty work?" My voice was as mocking as it could get for being so hoarse.

"Don't concern yourself with _who_ is looking for you, sweet heart. You'll get your answers soon enough," he grinned, blood oozing from his mouth and my lips curled in disgust, "I'll give you this _one_ answer though."

"Oh yeah? What's that?"

His eyes bore into mine, the bottomless black pits that they were, "your boyfriend's next on my list, and I'm going to make him beg…just like his sister."

I recoiled at his venomous answer and didn't have enough time to retaliate because I stream of smoke shot out of his mouth as well and I took a step backwards, allowing the body to fall to the floor. I was left with a few things:

Pain in my face and my throat,

Two dead bodies,

And a sense of undeniable panic.

Turning my attention back to Ryder, who stood there with a look of disbelief and horror, at that second the last bit of 'innocence' that he had, disappeared from him. He had just killed his first human being, something that could never be undone.

"C'mon," I stated, picking up the abandoned, empty gun and throwing it into my duffle bag, "let's go before more come."

The two of us took off and stealthily made it back to my bike.

* * *

I followed Ryder through my door and into the kitchen where I stood at the freezer to place a handful of ice cubes into a dishtowel for my aching face. Ryder headed back into the living room where music was now playing and not my usual station either. It was probably Dean who changed it and from here I could hear the three exchange words and then an outburst came and I took this as my cue to walk in with the ice over my cheek.

"They came back," Ryder repeated and then he turned to me, "Dani got us out of there…but they mangled her face a little."

My brothers looked at me and I gave a sheepish smile, pulling the cloth away so they could see the real damage, "I've had worse, Ryder. I'm fine." My voice was still coming out in rasps and it even failed me a few times, sounding similar to a radio fading in and out of tune.

"Holy shit, what the hell happened," Dean cried out, quickly standing to go over to me but with Sam's longer legs he got to me first, placing light pressure over the visible wounds.

"They came back…and I got into a fight with them."

"Them?" Sam asked, his eyes concerned, "how many of them?"

I could only mouth the number as my voice failed me again and I tried to clear my throat.

His hand rested on my shoulder and instant puppy eyes took over, "What's wrong, why can't you speak?"

Swallowing hard, I cleared my throat again only to have Ryder answer for me, stopping me from struggling too much, "he tried to strangle her, he wouldn't let her up."

Sam's other hand immediately turned my head upwards and he hissed at the bruises forming over the area where the Demon had squeezed.

"Lemon tea will help that, here… I'll-."

I placed a hand on his arm to stop him and shook my head before going over to the couch and falling into the seat beside Dean. He stared at the side of my face and I briefly looked back at him only to glare, "stop staring at me."

He smirked, "wow, they really did a number on your face, didn't they?"

"I've had worse, Dean. You and I both know that."

As quick as it came the smirk vanished as he remembered some of the other injuries I've had and then turned his dark look onto Ryder, "And where the fuck were you, picking your nose in all of this. You could have helped her, you know. This is why one of _us_," Dean ranted and then pointed at Sam and then himself, "should have gone with you; amateurs can't protect you like we can."

Noticing the look of shame on Ryder's face and the fact that his head was casted downwards I smacked Dean on the back of the head, "Shut your mouth, Dean. For your information, Ryder saved my goddamn life."

Both of them looked at me and at the same time as Dean said "he did?" Ryder said "I did?"

I smiled as much as my mouth would let me without being in pain, "yes, you did Ryder. If you hadn't of shot him, I probably wouldn't be conscious right now."

"But you told me to shoot him; I was only doing what you told me. I didn't even think to, I freaked out and didn't know what I was doing, and-."

I held out a hand to stop his verbal flow, "The main point is that _you did_ shoot him, and gave me enough time to recuperate and jump back on him."

It was silent until Ryder looked at the clock and stood, "I should probably get home…it's been a long day." He turned to exit the room and I snapped at him.

"You aren't going anywhere. You're going to stay right here where I can keep an eye on you."

He turned with a raised eyebrow, "you sound like my mother."

"You heard what he said!" I spoke, jumping to my feet, "you're next on the list, and they're going to come after you."

Ryder shrugged, "I think I'll be okay."

"Ryder, I can't let you go by yourself. Just stay and I'll take you home in the morning."

He came to stand before me and his hands gripped my shoulders with a comforting pressure, "Dani, I'm a big boy now. I can take care of myself."

I had a flash back of telling my father and Dean that very same sentence, that I could take care of myself, I'd be fine, and it struck home for me. I knew what he was feeling, thinking that he'd be okay when I knew damn well that he wouldn't be if he got caught.

My eyes watered and they moved over his face frantically, "if I let you go and something happens, I'll never forgive myself."

"Dani…"

The way he said my name had me moving out of his grip and over to the duffle bag where I dumped the contents onto the table and brought it to the kitchen. From the living room they heard me going through the cupboards and throwing things inside and when I came back I grabbed the flask of holy water I kept on the side table and another fully loaded gun and stuffed them into the bag as well.

"If you're going to go, you will not unless you're prepared. Inside I've given you three salt containers. When you get home place a line of salt at the bottom of every door, and along every window sill, the demons won't be able to get in. If something happens along the way, you have a flask of holy water, which burns them and a loaded gun, with extra bullets _if needed_."

I shoved the bag into his hands and he nodded slightly unsure of what was happening, "I want you to call me when you get home, and to stay on while you do the salt, I will hunt you down if you don't call me."

Ryder nodded and went to exit once again when I called him back. I dug into my pockets and pulled out my set of keys, "here," I said, throwing them to him, which he caught, "take my bike. You'll get there quicker."

He smiled and this time exited to the kitchen and as a last thought I called out, "if I find one scratch on my baby, I'll kick your ass… and that's a promise."


	11. I didn't Cry

Chapter ten: I didn't Cry

The door snapped shut with Ryder's exit and blearily, I made my way over to the table and eased myself down onto one of the chairs, at this moment I felt older and more fragile that I had ever felt in my entire hunting life. I think that, finally, I was suffering the wear and tear of the job and briefly I wondered how much longer it would take for this blade to wear down completely. The silence was peaceful now that some of the commotion had died down and I allowed my bones and muscles to relax as my eyes closed. The minutes in silence ticked by and my eyes remained closed, forgetting about the two other bodies in the room until one of them asked me if I was okay. Cracking one eye open I let out an inaudible sigh and yawned largely, ending in a weary nod and an even more exhausted "I'm fine."

"You don't look fine."

I stood and scratched at my stomach, "I'm just tired…and it's too early to go to bed."

Sam stood up with a gentle smile and began to lead me towards where my room was, "You're tired, go to bed."

"Noooo," I groaned, attempting to push him away which was only a half hearted attempt.

Again he grabbed my shoulders and led me towards the hall, "your body needs to sleep, Dani."

"I don't wanna," I whined, feeling much like the little kid again who would plead with Dean to let her stay up late.

Sam, knowing that he wasn't going to get anywhere with me changed direction and pulled me to the couch, dragging me down to sit in the spot between him and Dean. "If you won't go to bed then sit down and relax."

"Murrmph." I have no idea what it was but it was something between a grunt and a reply. I slumped against Dean's shoulder and dug my feet underneath Sam's thigh. Staring at the opposite wall for the longest time and the object that occupied my interest was the framed photograph of our little group, taken a few weeks before it was torn apart. Now it was painful to look at the faces of my now deceased friends, instead of remembering them I remembered ways I could have saved them.

When I was about to comment on the picture my mind subconsciously decided to change the topic before it came up.

"I didn't cry."

There was silence for a few minutes, and then Dean moved his shoulder, jostling me. I guess they were waiting for me to continue.

"What was that?"

I paused before answering, "I didn't cry when Dad died."

Another silence came, but this time it was an empty "I don't know what to say" silence that rung in my ears. I was starting to believe that I shouldn't have brought this topic up, because I can't exclude the possibility of an argument in the making.

"What's going on Dani?" Dean asked, pushing me into a sitting position, "you haven't talked about Dad since…"

"Since before he was alive," Sam finished with his own concern evident in his tone, but Sam was always concerned for me so it made no difference.

I shifted violently before standing up abruptly to pluck the picture off of the wall. I blew the dust off and stared nostalgically at the photo, rubbing my thumbs over the now absent people from my life. I looked at my brothers, my eyes watering once again and I spoke around my constricting throat, "how did I accept Dad's death so quickly…when I can't even get over Miles's death from a few weeks ago."

Both of my brothers looked at a loss for words for I never show these kinds of emotions freely. My typical means of dealing was keeping everything to myself, bottling it up for something big to push me over the edge. I knew it wasn't healthy but most of the time I was the shoulder to lean on, not the other way around…the majority of my friends needed my strength to support them but I've never felt the need for theirs. I guess even a leader needs a guide sometimes.

"Why is it that I can cry for them, but not once did I shed a single tear for Dad?" I continued to choke out, the sudden urge to throw the picture made my hands itch.

"Them? Who else died, Dani?" Sam asked me.

Swallowing hard I came to sit back down, my shoulders hunched, "Miles… died first, he was going away to art school after the summer… Matt was so proud of him," I blabbered on, my voice cracking a number of times while I stared at a large painted picture of myself that leaned against the wall, "he made that for me…I should probably hang that soon…," I gave a sob laugh, "and then Des died… she was heading for Paris next year… to finish her Culinary experiences and now Penny's dead too… three gone because of me… one's in jail and the other's a target."

I sighed, pushing a hand through my hair and then shoved the frame onto the table only to sit back again. "All I do is think now…" I stated, "My mind's non stop all the time and it never stops. Lately with everything that's been going on I've been thinking about Dad… you know?" I stopped and looked at them and they were both just watching me, "I'm trying to do what he would do, and the more I think about it the more I just wish he were here, to help me… to help us."

Dean nodded with a small smile on his lips, his hand squeezed my knee, "We all have, Dani. You're not the only one."

I nodded slowly with my eyes closed, more tears leaking out from beneath my lashes, and I felt Sam's arm go around my shoulders, "Looking back I realize that the only way to explain my lack of tears is that… I had already accepted."

I could feel the two of them share a look above my head and I continued, "I had already accepted his death. I knew he was planning this from the moment Sam found out what those objects were really used for."

"You knew, and you didn't tell me, or tell Dean." Sam demanded, shocked to learn that I had kept this from him.

"You forget that Dean was a little comatose at the time, Sam. Besides, may I remind you that the both of you kept Dean's little deal from me for a good _three months_."

"That was way after, that doesn't even count as an excuse," Dean snapped.

"Dad _told_ me not to say anything, he said it was a final order and I _obeyed_ him. I knew everything that was going on after the accident. All of you thought I was just in some sort of shock, or I was just hiding behind a shell and while I was keeping silent I _observed_."

Dean had closed his mouth but Sam still looked like he wanted to say something so I pressed on before he could, "while you guys thought that I was sleeping or had my headphones on too loud and you would fight, or have troubled conversations I was actually listening."

I would have laughed at their identical faces but this was a serious matter, "_yeah_, I listened. I know you two cried. I knew you missed him and man you guys don't know how to deal with a loss… but who am I to talk, right?"

They both gave a thoughtful nod as I swung my arms up around their necks, and then I gave an ironic chuckle, "I may not have cried… but I sure was angry. Angry at everything and everyone, all I wanted was for everyone to just drop so I could think for a while… so I could sort myself out. I remember going into one of the motel rooms that we _weren't_ staying in and I completely trashed the place. Put holes in the walls, broke lamps and windows and the television… ripped up the bed… just completely destroyed the place," I stated, "but not _once_ did I cry." I added bitterly.

Sam turned and grabbed my by both shoulders, forcing my body to face his, "Dani. Stop beating yourself up about this, crying for your friends and not crying for Dad does not mean you cared more about them… it means you _loved_ Dad more than your friends."

I gave him a confused look, trying to understand what he was saying because this damn college kid was always speaking in friggen riddles.

"Being able to love, is being able to let go, Dani," Sam explained, "I loved Jess, but I still had to let go… I had to learn to _accept_."

"But that's different;" I choked, "that's a different kind of love."

Sam shook his head and locked my eyes with his, "Love is Love is Love. It's all the same brand…it just comes in different products. Family love is still love, and so is romantic love and friend love… but in the end it's all love. It all feels the same, the same passion and desire… the same _emotions_, the only difference is that it's aimed at a variety of people and to love them you have to be able to let go."

Newborn tears leaked from my eyes and my lip quivered dangerously while I tried to suck in air only for it to come in as a wheeze and out as a sob. I tipped forward and fell into Sam, sensing his arms come around me in a crushing hug that was so familiar in the traditions we practiced when we could feel the other's emotions. In my experience-and I'm sure they're reflected back to me- the fact that we can feel when the other is in pain, we can only hope that by connecting our bond, we can take some of the pain away from the other.

Over my sobbing I couldn't hear the extremely small conversation that Sam and Dean shared over my shaking body.

"You know…you should really listen to your own advice… it's a good opinion to have."

Sam only looked at him and held me tighter before lifting me into his arms, "I'm going to put her to bed… I think she needs some well deserved sleep."

Dean nodded in agreement and watched as his brother disappeared into the hallway. When he was alone in the room he propped his elbows on his knees and rubbed his face, only to have his hands stop over his opened mouth and his eyes raised to the ceiling,

"Help me save her."


	12. Marked

Chapter eleven: Marked

Getting up the next morning was actually pretty smooth sailing for once. It was probably the best sleep I had gotten in years and the only flaw was the pounding headache that came after I had stood up… but I guess I could chalk that up to having my head pounded in by those demons yesterday. The thought of the "ambush" sent a chill up my spine and the demon's words echoed in my head _I'm going to make him beg… just like his sister… sister… sister… sister… _

I glared at my reflection while pulling on an old zip up sweater, "Over my dead body."

When I walked into the living room, my bare feet made soft thuds against the wood, and that's where I found the four bodies already occupying my table. It was kind of hard to believe that it's only been a day since Sam and Dean came back, it seemed so much longer in my mind that I was actually starting to worry about Castiel. I haven't seen him since after the funeral nor have I heard anything from him and I guess I was so used to having him just drop in all the time… I kind of missed him. Now here his is, sitting at my table like nothing's happened, like he hasn't disappeared for…

_A day? Christ, Dani. It's only been a day since you saw him, stop acting like a needy, afraid to be alone, clingy chick. No one likes those kinds of people, especially me, and I'll be damned if I ever become one of them. _

I was brought back down to earth when a comment was directed at me, "It's alive!"

Cracking a grin I swatted at Dean's head, and he ducked just in time for my hand to graze the top of his hair, "shut up!"

"You shut up," he shot back, his arm swinging up to hook around my waist then reel me into a bone crushing hug that was pretty much impossible to escape.

I half groaned and half laughed at our situation, it's been…years since we've acted like this and even in those times it was usually Sam and I tackling and squeezing each other, and Dean was the one telling us to knock it off. It was hard to believe that in the midst of this fog, Dean Winchester could be quite the child when he wants to be.

"Uhhh, why are you in such a good mood?"

Dean smirked that smart assed grin that seemed to have been glued permanently to his face as a baby, "Because I can be, what's your motive?"

_Well, if he wants to be a smartass, two can play that game._

"My house, I can do what ever I want."

"It's not even a house!" Sam teased, "It's an apartment."

I pointed a finger at him, a hand on my hip, "Hey! I'm working up to a house!"

Sam snorted loudly and I came up behind him to grip his shoulders tightly while looking at Ryder, "_this_ is what I've had to deal with my whole life," I explained, playfully digging my thumbs into his pressure points. Sam jerked out of my grip and glared icily at me through his bangs and I gave him a cheeky grin.

"Sorry puppy dog, you're very nonthreatening when you do that." Eager to piss him off further, I gave him a relatively soft slap to the cheek and then danced away into the kitchen.

"Did you eat Ryder?"

The sudden change of topic caught him off guard and a few seconds passed by before his brain could catch up long enough for him to answer, "uhh…yeah I ate."

I reappeared at the doorway to the kitchen, my hip leaning against the door frame, my arms crossed against my chest, "uh huh, and what did you have?"

"Cereal…"

I clucked my tongue at him and shook my head. I almost wished that I had an apron and a wooden spoon to scold him with, "that's definitely not enough. You need to eat more, string bean."

"HEY! I'm bigger than you."

Peeking around the corner at him with a frying pan in hand I smirked, one of my eyebrows was quirked, "you may be bigger than I… but there is no way in hell you're stronger."

"I bet you five bucks that I can beat you in arm wrestling."

I pretended to think about it for a moment and then spoke, "you don't have five bucks to give me."

_What makes you think you're going to win?_

The silence after his thought made me grin and bit my lip, feigning innocence, "I don't think I _know_."

"Oooh, you cocky little bitch."

For some reason, this morning seemed to be full of smiles and light hearted conversation, and I was totally unwilling to change that, "part of the Winchester charm, baby. Now who else is hungry? Cas, you up for breakfast?"

"Uh…I don't need to eat," Cas spoke, his hands in his lap like a polite little school boy, just sitting there listening to our conversation.

"Right…" I trailed off, "Eggs and Bacon it is!"

I had just pulled the whisk out of the drawer when I noticed Ryder in the doorway; I smiled at him, "what's up?"

"Need a hand?"

I thought for a moment, stirring the batter a few times to stall my brain, "uh… sure, if you want you could put on a pot of coffee, if not, you could set the table."

"Do you want me to do both?"

"If you like," I replied, pouring circles of batter on the hot pan.

Ryder came over and placed a hand on my arm, "are you okay?" he asked quietly, knowing that if chances are that I wasn't okay, I wouldn't want Sam or Dean to know… just yet, that is.

A purposeful funny face graced my expression when I looked at him, forcing a laugh out of him, "I'm great but the real question is: _are you okay_?"

He immediately sobered, hanging his head and he shrugged, "the best I can be for now, I guess."

I gave him a small knowing smile, intended to comfort because I don't think there's anything I wouldn't give to have him not be apart of this… to never have met me in the first place. A guy like him didn't deserve any of this, hell, no one did but those people like me were just born into it, we didn't have a choice. This time I gave him a serious look and rubbed his shoulder, "it's going to be okay, Ryder, it'll end soon. I promise."

Nodding, he gave me a tight hug that caught me off guard, but if I didn't know him I wouldn't have caught the movement of him wiping his eyes before moving to start coffee. It was silent between the two of us and I decided to leave him be, if he wants to speak he will, and just like I knew he would, he bounced off of the rebound wall in what felt like seconds.

"I _just _realised this now, but… are you making _pancakes_?" He asked dramatically.

I nodded while I flipped the few that were in the pan.

"Your _famous_ pancakes? Dude, you haven't made those in like… forever."

Grinning, I took the ready pancakes off of the hot pan and placed them on a tray which were placed into the toaster to keep warm, "I know," I smirked and poured more batter onto the pan.

"You're awesome," he laughed and kissed my cheek before disappearing to place mugs on the table.

"That's what I keep telling you!" I called back just in time for him to come back and narrowly miss knocking the bag of flour onto the floor.

I gave him a sarcastic look, and shook my head as a snicker escaped my lips, "you alright there?"

"Never better," he stated, taking up an armful of plates with food on them and I cringed inwardly, dreading the possibility that all of the food could end up on the floor. I could hear plates hitting the table and light laughter coming from the group of men in my dining room, and the sound made me smile. It was nice to hear that Ryder was getting along with my brothers.

Again Ryder returned, laughing at something that was said. He was laughing so hard that he wasn't watching where he was going… and once again he walked right into the table where the flour sat. I watched in slow motion as the bag teetered and fell in circles in the air where it crashed to the floor and a large white cloud burped out of the bag, turning my kitchen into one huge powdery snow storm, covering everything in sight, including Ryder, and myself. I stood there holding the flipper in the same way I would wield a knife or an iron crowbar, the only thing that was different was the expression on my face which resembled one of ruffled calculation. Slowly, I turned to face Ryder whose expression was a mix of innocent angel and "Oh shit, I'm going to get my ass kicked," and for a second I seriously considered kicking it from here to China but then I got a glimpse of his appearance and I busted out in laughter.

Ryder gave me a strange look and he too let out a nervous laugh, this only made me laugh harder and I bent at the waist, holding my stomach and tears slipped from my eyes. The laughter was so great that I was losing my ability to breathe.

"What are you laughing at; you've got it all over you too."

I wheezed for a few moments, trying to catch my breath but I wasn't doing so well with the task. My hand gripped the counter until my knuckles turned white before I could stand straight enough to look Ryder in the eyes, but doing so caused me to explode into laughter again, bringing him along for the ride.

"Y- You look like… a _ghost_," I gasped, holding my inflamed sides.

He laughed in agreement and while I tried to sober up he left again to place cups and mugs on the table and I heard a loud outburst of laughter come from Dean. He must have got a kick out of the new look that Ryder was supporting and funny enough, he looked vaguely like some of the things I've hunted in the past.

"Alright people, I have to eat this fast because I'm supposed to be at work in…" I trailed off to glance at the clock, "about an hour…and because of recent incidents," I stopped to stare pointedly at Ryder, "I have to shower, _again_."

I set down the plates of food, urging them to dig in and unsurprisingly, Dean didn't need to be told twice, but seeing this familiar trait made me smile, he was still the same old Dean. Quickly, I ate a couple of pancakes and some eggs and then ran to my room to grab some new clothes, disappearing into the bathroom afterwards. My shower was short and quick, but welcome nonetheless and I came back into the living room while scrubbing my thick blonde hair with a towel. I was slightly peeved that I didn't have time to blow dry my hair but the feeling quickly vanished when I realised I'd be taking my bike, and that was a good enough hair dryer if any.

I had thrown the towel onto the arm of the couch and gone into my room when Sam mentioned that he had found a potential hunt on the computer the night before, after he had put me to bed.

"Oh yeah? What is it?" I asked, returning with a hair brush and running it through the soaking knotted strands.

"Just your usual vengeful spirit, pretty easy case," He replied.

"Oh yeah," Dean jumped in, speaking around a mouthful of food, "it'll be a piece of cake, should take three days, tops."

Wincing at one particular large knot my voice came out strained, "well that's great, but why are you telling me? You don't need my permission to leave."

Sam looked to Dean and then back to me, "well… we were wondering if you wanted to come with us."

I paused with the hairbrush in my hair and stared at them like they had grown a second head.

Speaking around another mouthful of food, Dean added, "come on, it'll be just like old times, the three of us on a Hunt, and we'll tackle this in like one or two days… three at the most."

"I'd love to, you know I would, but I can't. I just can't do it this time, I have work to go to and I have things to figure out here, _and_ a mess to clean up. Not to mention a friend I have to bail out of prison and prove their innocence."

"Well, if you're sure you don't want a break from… all of this," Sam shrugged, taking the empty plates into the kitchen.

"I got too much to worry about here. Besides, if I go Ryder will miss me, can't let that happen… he get's possessive when I'm gone for too long. Right Ryder?" I grinned at him.

He gave me a blank look and then rolled his eyes, "Says you."

* * *

"Hey Dani, did you hear?"

I looked up from the table I was cleaning to see who had thrown the question at me. It was one of my coworkers, Chloe, we weren't as close as Penny or Des and I were but she was a good person to talk to nonetheless. As I watched her come closer to me I could see the bags that darkened her eyes and the whites that were veined red from exhaustion, we were all a little stressed because the townspeople didn't know who was next, and I was the only one who could stop it.

"Hear what?" I asked, squirting another table with disinfectant soap and wiping it down.

"A couple of dead bodies were found in Matt's house, there were like four of them!"

I quickly straightened and the cloth dropped to the table as the muscles in my hand retracted. The thing about Chloe is that she likes to talk, she likes to gossip and blow things way out of proportion, and that was the thing I hated about her. I knew for certain that there were not four bodies there; there had been only two because they were the ones Ryder and I had killed, the two Demons that had attacked us. So instead of calling her on it, I played along, hoping to hear what the Town knew.

"Oh yeah? Does the Sheriff know what went down?"

Chloe shook her head but her eyes lit up again a moment later, "No, but they were mercilessly shot to death. At least six times. _Each_."

My eyes widened and I nodded slowly in shock, _bullshit. If you knew what those fuckers were, you would have been cheering me on._

"Wow, that's terrible," I gushed, my hand going over my heart for extra emotion, "who would do such a thing?"

She shrugged, "Someone with no heart, that's who. And the biggest part is that they weren't even _from_ here."

_Well I could have told you that._

"Wow." I stated while picking the cloth back up, "I wonder what they were doing inside Matt's house? I thought it was taped off as a crime scene?"

A thoughtful look graced Chloe's face and she spoke, "you want to know what my theory is?"

I raised my eyebrows in question, urging her to continue.

"You know how Matt had that gambling problem a while back? Well I think they were old Poker sharks coming after some old game money that they were never paid back. The night Penny died, I think they were there and they knocked Matt out, killed her and then framed him, a couple days later they came back to loot the place to pay off his dept."

Chloe finished with a smug look on her face, she seemed quite proud of herself.

_You're an idiot._

"Well… that's some, _theory_, you've got there Chloe," I complimented, trying desperately to keep a smile from my face, "you should go talk to the Sheriff."

"Oh I already have… he didn't believe me."

I tried to feign shock and I hoped it worked, "I wonder why…"

"Yeah I know right? I wonder why too. Anyways, I gotta get back to work, I'll talk to you later Dani," she said with a smile and then walked off, her perky little ponytail bouncing with each step.

I turned back around to finish wiping the table down and snickered to myself, _how was I such a good actress? _I couldn't help but silently congratulate myself on this victory, and it was all thanks to Chloe's stupidity. Man, girls like _that_ give us Blondes a bad name, how did she even graduate _elementary_ school let alone high school. I quickly finished this table and moved onto the others in desperate need of cleaning.

When closing time was five minutes away my left pocket buzzed and I quickly pulled my phone out to read the text message before my boss saw me.

_Meet me._

"What the hell?" I muttered under my breath and then understood that it was from Castiel.

_Man, I don't want to do another session today._

Chloe stayed with me until closing time, she said that she felt it wasn't fair for me to close alone, that Max should have put me on with someone else and I was just too lazy to tell her I preferred the silence that came with being alone. I guess she wanted to talk some more out in the parking lot but I didn't give her a chance because by the time she was at her car I had already peeled out of the employees parking, ripping down the road leaving a cloud of dust behind me.

The surprise on her face brought a wild grin to my face.

* * *

Castiel was sitting at the old picnic table when I rolled up. I sat there on my bike after killing the engine and slowly took my helmet off, balancing it on the space in front of me. Looking at the Angel ahead of me the corner of my mouth lifted and I stood up.

"What's up Cas?" I asked him, shaking my blonde mane from my face.

He looked at me with that squinty eyed look, his hands clasped on the wooden surface, "I need to speak with you."

"Alright," I spoke gently after a few seconds and then came to sit across from him, "what's on your mind, Hun?"

Used to the pet name, Cas opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out, instead he swallowed hard and then tried again.

"I-I don't really know how to explain this."

"The beginning is the best place to start," I smiled at him, silently urging him to continue.

Again he swallowed before he started to speak, "Well… this morning I saw something, something that I was almost certain I'd never see again."

My eyes filled with confusion and I cocked my head to the side a little, "what was that?"

"A mark."

"A mark?" I asked, an eyebrow raising.

Castiel nodded, "One that happens to be on the back of your neck."

His comment startled me for a moment, and I blinked rapidly, "the mark upon the back of my neck? What… about… it?"

"How long have you had it?"

I furrowed my eyebrows together, "since I was born, Cas, what does this have to do with anything?"

Castiel nodded to himself it seemed as if a light bulb had turned on inside of him, like the worlds number one question had just been answered. Castiel had just had an epiphany, "now it all makes sense."

"Uh… _what?_"

He looked up at me suddenly, his bright blue eyes making me jump, "it all makes sense now. Dani, I think I can answer the question's you've been wanting answers to."

I gave him an incredulous look, I think Cas has finally lost it… it's like he's grown a second head or something, "Wh-what?"

"Dani… I know who you are."

Castiel paused and gazed deeply at me, there was something he was holding back.

"Or rather… _what_ you are…'


	13. The Truth is Hard to swallow

Chapter Twelve: The truth is hard to swallow

Three days had passed.

Three days ago Castiel had decided to once again, dump everything on me in one dose and the claustrophobia was setting in. I felt as if I was miles deep beneath the oceans surface and everything was dark around me, the pressure surrounding my head, making everything hard to bare, making it almost impossible to breathe. My stomach was in knots and my throat was in constant constriction, making me choke on my own existence. Why must I be forced to break before my time? Is this a test?

Have I not proven myself enough?

I feel as if slowly, my world is crumbling around me, ready to break with the slightest increase of pressure. I can't tell which way is up and which is down, my mind is unfocused on the important things and all that floods my mind is Castiel's words.

_What you are…_

My eyes shut tightly against the memory, desperately hoping to erase the words, pleading that it wasn't true, that it was all a dream… a _nightmare_.

Blindly lumbering to the bathroom I flicked on the blinding white light and hissed at the pain my eyes felt. I dragged myself over to the mirror and against their will; I peeled my eyes open to gaze into a face I barely recognized anymore. I was pale, with slight bags under my eyes from no sleep last night, my hair was scraggily and limp, and in all fairness, I looked similar to a zombie.

I gripped the ceramic edges of my sink until my knuckles turned white and frustrated tears slipped from my eyes. I felt pathetic, crying for myself in self pity, what have I become? I've never cried for myself but now all I can see is the darkness surrounding me, and I can't find the light to break it.

"Dani?"

Startled, my head shot up to look in the mirror and I studied my red and puffy eyes, the blotchiness of my skin made me grimace. Quickly wiping at my eyes with a Kleenex I replied back,

"Y-yeah?"

As I splashed my face with cold water I heard Ryder ask me if I was okay. I swung the door open and he was standing right before me and I smiled at him, flinging the damp towel behind me, "Oh yeah, I'm fine."

Ryder gave me a look, "your eyes are red."

I had to think of something quick, something that would pass off as a reasonable lie because if I didn't and the longer I took to say something Ryder would become concerned, and would keep on pestering me until I confessed what was truly on my mind.

But the thing is... the only one who could ever really get stuff out of me was Bobby. The man was practically another Father to me… and sometimes he scared me more than my own ever did.

"I just got a little soap in them, washing my face you know?" I lied quickly, pushing past him and going into my empty but brightly lit living room because if he saw my face, he'd know I was lying and that would only lead to one big fight.

So I did the next best thing, changed the subject, "… How did you get in?" I asked, turning around to face him.

He gave me a calculating look after catching the last few seconds of my weak face but dismissed it, rubbing the back of his head causing his hair to spike up at the back.

He gave me a sheepish look, "I… brought my key… this time."

I chuckled at his poor memory and turned on the CD player to a low volume, "So… how's the whole, "booby trapped" house thing going for you?"

He shrugged, shoving his hands deep into his pockets, his lip curled up in a shameful smirk, "Oh you know… its going."

"_Going_ …? You _have_ been remembering to touch up the salt lines, right?"

Ryder nodded, "I've got a demon trap under my rug in the living room and on the ceiling in my bedroom."

I was about to open my mouth when he jumped in,

"And I've got plenty of Holy Water to douse an army of Demons."

A grin split across my face and I pinched his cheek, "My little boy's all grown up," I teased.

He stuck his tongue out at me and gave me a light shove where I toppled onto the couch with my legs dangling over the arm rest. He came to sit on the other side with his back leaning up against his own arm rest and his socked feet wiggled under my head.

"Ryder!" I whined as my hands grabbed his ankles making him bust out laughing. I smacked his knee while he continued to laugh but all the same he stopped moving his feet, and then it was silent between us. A grin still plastered to the both of our faces while we sat in each other's company, the silence continued for a good ten minutes until it was broken when Ryder opened his mouth.

"What's happening?"

I arched an eyebrow at the wall ahead of me. That question could be asked about many things in the world but the thing that struck me the most was the one little detail in Ryder's life that stood out to me,

Big things like that didn't concern him. Why things were happening didn't faze him, and what things didn't bother him, I guess he always figured that what ever didn't affect him directly wouldn't ever hurt him. This here was also his problem, his downfall… the fact that he underestimates the true powers of the world and what creatures it contains, and now that he's involved in my life- in a world of Myth and Legend that I was born into- he's going to have to face up to the true horrors I've faced all my life, he will have to start concerning himself with the Supernatural or he will find himself at the bottom of the food chain _very quickly_.

"With…" I urged him to continue as I savagely gnawed at the irritatingly short nail on my thumb, completely ignoring the searing pain that shot through my nerves.

"With the world… I mean since I met you crazy shit's been happening and I would really like to know "what's up"."

Sighing I hauled myself up into a sitting position beside him and placed my hands in my lap, "I'm going to be completely honest with you, Ryder. It's something big, _no_ it's something _huge_ and I fear it's much bigger than Sam, Dean and I put together."

Ryder also pulled himself into an upright sitting position, mirroring my own right beside me. He was looking at me expectantly, like I was about to let him in on the Secret to the Universe. I paused, allowing my thoughts to collect and blew out a steady stream of air through my nose, "I don't know what it is."

From what I could tell, it took Ryder a few seconds to comprehend that I had just told him the most fleshed out "I don't know" ever, and then his face went blank, clearly unimpressed.

"You know, I was expecting this huge answer that would satisfy everything I needed to know."

Defeated, I hung my head in frustration that I couldn't tell him what he wanted to hear, because the truth is that I had no clue as to what was going on, or who was behind it all. Slowly I shook my head and patted his knee, "I wish I could give you something to go on, but I don't have anything."

More silence passed between us and my hand remained on his knee for the longest time, I had actually forgotten it was there until I felt his larger one frame mine, the warmth making its way up my arm.

"Do you think it's the end of the world?"

I didn't answer for a long time and when I did the strain in my voice was clearly evident, "whether it is or isn't Ryder, Armageddon is not going to come for quite some time."

_God I wish I could help her more, I wish I knew what I was doing with all of this. I just want to take some of her stress away._

What he thought was silence as I stared at the wall opposite me, I thought it was enlightening and as I listened to his thoughts, subconsciously his thumb rubbed circles on the top of my hand. I tried not to notice it but with every rotation my hand grew hotter and hotter and I was pretty sure the blush was creeping up my neck and into my face.

_Why can't I just tell her?_

I struggled to keep the alarm off of my face, if he caught any hint that I was listening to him, the thoughts would come to an abrupt stop all together.

But what did he need to tell me?

_I love you_.

My eyes bugged ever so slightly and I felt the air constrict in my throat, I struggled to breathe normally. Did that really happen? Did my best friend just think the words I thought I'd never be able to say, let alone _think_ again?

How the hell do I react to this?

Well, it's a good thing I didn't have to because there was a sudden breeze and a flutter of wings and suddenly, Castiel stood in the middle of my living room. I looked up startled, but thankful our "silence" was cut off early.

"Where's Sam and Dean?" he asked me, looking around warily, half expecting an ambush from Dean.

I chuckled at the thought of Dean tackling him but answered Castiel with a "they're not back yet."

"Oh… well I guess I'll just… stay here then," he said, coming to sit on the other side of me, his back straight and his hands clasped in his lap.

I looked over at the Angel and raised an eyebrow, "You're really going to sit there the entire day?"

Without looking at me he shrugged his shoulders at the wall, "why not?"

I shook my head, standing and then clapped him on the shoulder, "C'mon Angel Boy, I need you to come with me somewhere."

I saw the wounded puppy look that Ryder gave me, the one that clearly said "why can't you take me?"

"Ryder." I spoke like I was speaking to a child, "I'm going to see Matt. I doubt you would want to go."

His face immediately changed to one of sadness mixed with betrayal and I gave him a pitied look, "Ryder I know how you feel but we all know that it wasn't Matt who killed Penny."

Ryder refused to look at me and I sighed, "We'll be back in a little while, keep yourself entertained."

* * *

When my motorcycle came to a rumbling halt in front of the Police department I found my trench coat wearing Angel shadow already there, standing in the shade. A ghost of a smile tugged at the corner of my lips and I sauntered over with my hands shoved into my leather jacket. In the back of my mind I acknowledged the buzzing of thoughts from the people puttering about down town. I didn't bother to delve into their business; I had my own to attend to and I was becoming too used to their constant presence.

I stepped up onto the cement platform and stood in front of Castiel, leaning up against the support pillar, "Cas, how come I can't read your mind?"

"Because, I am an Angel of the Lord."

I gave him a blank look and scoffed, "is that your excuse for everything, _Angel of the Lord_."

Amusement laced his eyes and he gave me a rare smile, "You are not like me… not yet."

I continued to stare at him while he looked around with his uncomfortably confused face, "so… what's the plan?"

Physically shaking myself, my eyebrows scrunched together, "plan?"

"You asked me to come here for a reason, did you not?"

"If things get out of hand, I need you for back up," I stated, "But I don't think it's going to get too bad," I continued while I slyly lifted back the loose T-shirt to reveal the hilt of a silver Beretta 92FS. With a wink I disappeared through the front door, leaving Castiel before he could get a word in.

The door closed with a snap behind me and sudden coolness washed over me. I could hear the air conditioner in the back of the room where a couple of loud defective noises would interfere with the otherwise steady humming rhythm. I looked around for an effective person to talk to but all seemed to be busy, at least the ones that I was comfortable speaking with. Everyone must still be working on Penny and Des's case, the most current ones… everyone except,

"Can I help you, Ma'am?"

_Ma'am? Who the hell is he calling… oh._

"Hi, um… I'm looking to speak with Matt Oreson."

The guy looked up from the papers he was shredding and squinted at me from thin, silver rimmed glasses, "you a friend of his?"

I nodded quickly, "yeah, I've been busy for a few days and haven't been able to come see him. I'm sure he needs to see someone right about now, someone other than his lawyer."

He continued to squint at me, like he was trying to decide if I was a danger or if I could possibly try to break him out. After all, Matt was their prime suspect in every murder so far, and he was caught with the blood of one of the victims on his hands.

"Alright, I'll take you in… you have half an hour." The police officer spoke while rising from his chair. He lifted the counter open, allowing me to enter the space behind his desk, "this way Ma'am," he beckoned and I quickly followed behind him. The officer came to a halt outside of a metal door and the key ring chimed as he pulled it from his belt loop.

"Do you need someone to watch over you Miss? In case the criminal attempts an attack?"

I gave the young officer a small smile; the man must be a rookie, how he abided the rules, word for word, "That's not necessary, Officer, I highly doubt he'd attack me."

The Officer nodded and the lock sprung open, "Oreson, you've got a visitor," the Oficer barked, he turned to me and nodded for me to go inside, "I'll be out in the hallway if you need anything, if you're ready early knock on the door."

I nodded and slipped into the open space in front of Matt's holding cell, the metal door slamming shut behind me. The sound didn't faze him as he remained still on his back on the cot's surface. His arm and leg dangled over the edge closest to me and the other arm was flung across his eyes. His clothes were rumpled and his hair was grungy, even from a distance I could only imagine what it must feel like. Watching him now, I felt pity and my own fear. Here one of my best friends lay with his girlfriend's murder over his head, and a death sentence of his own. I was desperate to break him out because being in jail he was an easy target, and I knew I was running out of time.

"Matt?"

The arm covering his eyes slipped away and his eyes snapped open to look at me. I smiled at him and gave a small wave, "Sorry that I haven't been around."

In a flash, Matt was up off of the cot and at the bars, gripping the poles tightly, "Dani! I'm so glad to see you!"

My smile wavered just a little when I heard how hoarse his voice was, but I smiled again nonetheless, walking up to the bars, "How are you Hun? You doing okay?"

With these simple questions the small light in his eyes died and he slumped into the bars. For a split second he was an old man, weak and depressed.

And it broke my heart.

"No one believes me, Dani. I don't even think my Lawyer does. They, they all look at what's obvious to them, they don't factor in how much I love her."

I nodded, consciously taking note of the present use of Love, I wasn't sure if it was denial that she's really dead or he refuses to let his feelings go, but all the same I nodded in agreement and muttered soothingly, "I know, Matt," as I wrapped my hands around his tense ones.

"Damn it Dani," he snapped, ripping his hands away and running them through his dirty hair, making it stand up at odd angles. I could see it in his eyes, the defeat, the _anger _over what had happened, the bitter knowledge that he never took his chance, "I was going to propose to her that night."

My eyebrows shot up in surprise, I knew he had always planned on it but I didn't know he was going to do it _then_.

A mournful sigh came from him and he pulled a small antique ring from his pocket. I watched as he passed it between his fingers, "it was my grandmothers."

It was painful to watch the nostalgia take over his face, his eyes misted over with the hallucination of what could have been. I could see in his face that everyday he would go through scenario after scenario of what could have happened, all so beautiful and romantic.

"Matt?"

He hesitantly looked up at me, but I had the feeling that he wasn't really seeing me, the ring still moved between his fingers.

"I know this hurts, I know how you must feel, and losing a loved one… it's not easy."

He scoffed at my attempt at sympathy, "Dani, you don't do sympathy very well, I appreciate the attempt but just stop trying to understand what I'm going through. You don't know, and you never will, it's more than just losing her, but being pinned as the cause of her death. I'm not sure which is worse."

I paused at his bluntness, completely side stepping the snarky comment, "You're absolutely right, Matt, I don't know how being pinned for a loved one's murder feels, but I do know the desperate feeling as you watch them slip through your very fingers. I know what it feels like to watch them die, and you can't do a damned thing about it… all you can do is tell them that it's going to be okay, when they know very well that it's not."

He looked at me curiously, realising my speech was turning personal… _very_ personal, "Dani?"

I stared back at him with fierce determination in my eyes, "I'll tell you what I do know though, I know for a _fact_ that you didn't kill Penny, and I'll prove it too, even if it's the last thing I'll ever do."

"Danielle, is… is there something you need to talk about?"

Subtly, my lip quivered and I averted my eyes from his. I shook my head, not trusting myself to speak.

"Dani," he spoke gently, his hands coming to close around mine, "I think you and I have the same problem."

"Yeah? And what's that?"

He smiled in a way that wasn't comforting, but pitiful, "we both don't realize what we have until it's gone, and too late to save."

* * *

I tore out of the parking lot before saying anything to Castiel. I wasn't headed home because I didn't feel like dealing with Ryder I just needed somewhere to calm down for a bit. Just when I thought I had all of my emotions in check, when I thought nothing could touch me and that I could take anything and anyone down if I had to, the skeletons from my closet were coming back to haunt me.

When I pulled up at the Junk yard I found Castiel already standing in the centre of the clearing, his back facing me. How he knew I was going to come here, I'll never know, but I dismounted my bike nonetheless and made my way over to the old picnic table. I took a seat with my back leaning against the edge of the table and stared across the clearing at my bike, blankly. A deep sigh escaped my mouth and I felt Cas take a seat beside me.

"You left in a hurry."

Leaning forward I pulled the gun out of my jeans and placed it on the wood behind me with a thud. Once again I settled and my eyes drifted closed.

"Why are you here Cas?"

I could feel his curious gaze on my skin and I shivered softly. "Sitting beside you? I could leave if you wish to be alone…"

"No! I mean… why are you here… on Earth? I thought your job was to rescue Dean from Hell." I interjected.

"It was, and I have successfully raised him from perdition."

"Obviously Castiel, otherwise he wouldn't be here," I ridiculed, my lips sinking into a frown.

I felt him turn to me, the sleeve of his trench coat brushing my shoulder, "so what's your question, Danielle?"

"Why haven't you gone back to Heaven? I mean, your job here is done, don't you have superiors to report back to?"

A haunted smile grace his lips, the emotion not reaching his eyes, "I can't go back."

"Can't or Won't?"

He was still for a moment, not even his chest rose as he breathed and for a split second I thought he had ceased the action, "A combination I guess, I believe God has given me a second task… although he is not certain of it yet."

I opened my mouth to speak but the ghost words were caught on my tongue, I had opened my mouth before I knew what I was going to say and my face screwed up into confused thought to compensate, so my brain decided to stall, "And… what task… is that?"

"You."

The way he said this was simple, so simple that he once again caught me off guard, "what do you mean _me_?"

"I believe I'm here to train you, to _guide_ you, you might say. However, times have changed and I feel more of the need to protect you."

"I don't need protection," I growled, daring him to argue with me.

He smirked at me, "no, no _you _don't but…"

"Is this because of who you said I am?" I interrupted, this time turning my own body to face his.

"Danielle, there is a reason why you and I share the same mark on the back of our necks."

I raised an eyebrow, "The buddy system?"

His face was so serious I swore for a second he was going to strike me, "No, Danielle. We are Marked for _each other_, we're soul mates. This is what Heaven has decided, all those centuries ago when we were created, when _you_ were created, every Angel is to have a Partner, whether it's a partner in crime, love or war. Two marked Angels could absolutely hate each other, but they still couldn't live without each other."

"So… you're saying that this is our destiny?"

Castiel nodded, "and when I say they can't live without each other, I mean that literally, if you were to die tomorrow, so would I. Think of us as two halves to a soul, where you go, I go. Your enemy is my enemy… your fight is my fight, and vice versa. You cannot escape it, and nor can I, it's not a relationship, it's a bond like invisible ropes tying us together."

I stared at him for what felt like hours after he had finished speaking, and then like my brain had completely detached itself from me I began to lean forward involuntarily.

"Danielle, what are you doing?"

I smiled lightly, licking my lips slowly, "testing the bond."

The 'd' barely left my lips when they were pressed to his and my eyes closed. My hand positioned itself on his shoulder but I dared not to venture further, all that I knew was that the chaos that my emotions were causing in my heart and in my head had completely vanished into thin air. My paranoia and haunted past were silenced and shoved into the back in my mind, and I don't think it had anything to do with who I was kissing and why… all that really mattered to me was the sudden peace that now felt.

Like a dream the moment came and went so fast that I barely had time to hold onto it when I felt Castiel push me away, "Danielle, you're human… you are confused and at a vulnerable state, and I can't do this… not with you."

"B-but, but you said that…"

"I said that you and I are Marked, that you and I share the same mark. I never said that _you_ and _I_ were bonded, its Rael and I that are bonded. You aren't an Angel, Danielle, you're human… humans and Angels are never Marked."

I looked away from him, my lip starting to quiver and I squeezed my eyes shut, a tear slipping out of the eye furthest from him.

"I'm sorry, Dani."

I shook my head violently and jumped up, "I get it," I said, near hysterics, "I get it completely, I'm just Human… not good enough I guess. Even though I look like her and I act like her and I even sound like her according to you but I'm still not good enough. Take some of my advice _Angel Boy_; don't get yourself hung up over a single person, someone who isn't coming back. It won't get you anywhere, and it sure doesn't do wonders to your feelings." I snapped at him.

My throat was ceasing up and I spun around quickly so I wouldn't have to look at him. Thunder sounded overhead and I stormed over to my bike, shoving the helmet on I jumped on and kicked her into a rumbling start all in one movement. Just as I tore out of the junkyard with a spray of gravel, the clouds opened up and the afternoon's downpour began.


End file.
